Page 52 - Demo

Giving Others an Empathy “Pass”
Sharon Goodenow
Instructional Systems Designer/eLearning Specialist Kilda Group LLC
During the past several months, I found myself becoming more easily irritated with others: family, friends, work mates, neighbors, people in stores. I suspect that they are so wound up in problems of their own, they don’t realize how their behavior is affected.
To help myself, and so I don’t add to their problems, I have devised a “pass” that I mentally give people now, and then I just let my irritation go. I imagine the things they might be going through, both known and unknown to me, and try to see their rudeness or shortness as a small vent for their frustration or fear. Since I now have a mental image in my head of the pass, I can just issue one to them and go on without making a ruckus. If the interaction is getting particularly harsh, I concentrate on writing their name on the pass in my head. If it goes on, I might have to imagine signing my name at the bottom and writing the date. I might even need to think of what number pass this could be! Usually, if I can think about that pass, I can last long enough to leave the situation without adding anything negative to the encounter and focus on releasing any negative feelings I have. Concentrating on the release of ill feelings is healing to me. I think about not being the cause of someone else having to give ME a pass for MY behavior!
This empathy pass concept is part of an effort I think many people are making to be a little kinder to everyone with whom they interact. Sadly, it is not difficult these days to imagine things that others might be worried or upset about.
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