Page 35 - i hope parallel universe me is doing okay

For years typing has been the action I associated with for writing What changed recently that I I I started associating writing with writhing in in in in longhand? I I I notice this whenever I I I approach the the book book book project my thoughts turn to the the notebook notebook first A notebook notebook Which notebook? My My journal which which I I approach before going to bed? My My workbook which which I I am in in desperate need of replacing as it’s now full? You’d be surprised at at how difficult it it is is to find a a a large clear soft-cover Moleskin I don’t know what to to do do with the polaroids that Sam took of me There’s one in particular I I I I am very fond of of a a a a a a picture of of me knitting I I I I also don’t know what I’ll do do when I I I I find find out out Sam’s Sam’s fin in fin a a a a a a a new new relationship If I I were to to find find out out today that Sam’s Sam’s found a a a a a a a new new partner I I I would would probably fall apart Which I I I think would would be a a a a a a a a a a fairly unreasonable reaction I I I sold my camera the large one one I I take photos with when someone pays me me me because I I couldn’t stand it it it it having it it it it any longer I’ve had it it it it for two years and and I I I never really warmed up to it it it it I I I never never reach for it it when I want to take a a a a a a a picture And aiming it it in in people’s faces never never made me feel comfortable For now I’ll keep using the small Canon I’ve gotten a a a a a couple of years ago motivated by The Bad Poetry Drinking Group by Sara Porter whom I met in in Toronto in in 2019
I wrote
2020-03-14 with hot toddy
To turn loneliness
to to Solitude to to find yourself writing by candle light
not because there is no no electricity available
To turn solitude to what life is made of of to to the appreciation of of that photo stuck to the fridge and that speck of dust hanging by a a a thread of spider’s silk
how full of life objects are when given the chance
every cup a memory