Page 58 - Developer

arreSted developmeNt // mattHeW WaStelaNd

I don’t know. I think you’re too How’s that incendiary? I’m
hot to be a game journalist...a real just stating a fact.
one, anyway. I’d be, like, “Are you A fact? That sounded a lot like
really into games? Probably not. an opinion to me. Are you sure you
You’re just doing this because of know the difference between—
all the free attention you get.” Sorry, I have to run. I need to
That’s a thing that happens in the catch the new episode of My Little
game business, see—there are Pony: Friendship is Magic. Hey, do
these girls who aren’t really into you watch that show?
games, they just—
Okay, slow down there. What
did you just say?
Huh? That was just a little
joke. Anyway, I said you were hot. But...But...They’ve done
You should feel complimented! studies about this; I’ll totally
Google for them when I get home.
They have, I remember it really
clearly. It’s this completely
proven scientific fact that women
You still don’t hear it? Let me are more—
play it back again. Okay? I’m going Why don’t you stop right there.
to rewind it and play it back again. I’m sorry, but arguing about this
[faint audio]: “Easy mode is isn’t going to get us where we
very forgiving. It’s so simple your need to be. I’m going to suggest
girlfriend could play it.” instead that you simply avoid
Okay, one more time. Tell me talking
what’s wrong with that. about
I...I don’t know. anything
You don’t know? Think about it unrelated to
for just a little longer... the talking
Uh, uh...is it because I’m points in
assuming everyone has a the packet.
girlfriend? I mean, I guess if Okay? No
someone was gay, they might get opinions, no “facts,” nothing other
mad at me? than Demons with Guns 2 is going
PR COACH hard on it, and it features a new
to be a great game, we’re working
Keep thinking.
THE multiplayer mode.”

InsIde the publIc relatIons department’s Well, To be honest, I think
secret traInIng sessIons ...and I don’t know about you’re the one who doesn’t
those people who are into those understand. I mean, I know that,
Preparing for an upcoming media event is hard work—you anime-style games. I think sure, politicians or whoever have
never know what devious curveballs a hard-hitting game they’re biased, and it’s not fair. to say things in a certain way. But
journalist might lob your way. Thankfully, the big publishers Because people are, like, “Oh, it’s this is the video game industry.
often have professional, highly skilled PR staff who can advise awesome.” But it’s not. That anime It’s part of the culture—
and train game developers in the art of sticking to talking stuff is all just gibberish anyway. Shush. Did you hear me?
points and saying things correctly. Let’s take a peek behind Okay, let’s take a step back here... No talking.
the curtain to see how this mysterious process works! It is, though. All I’m saying I was just—
is, that’s a double standard. If Shh.
audience. I just gave a big talk to you like anime, but you don’t like Okay. Jeez. I—
my screaming fans last E3. the kinds of games I make, then Shh.
I’ve coached politicians, Yes, I watched that video. To be you’re being biased toward anime ...
lawyers, CEOs—people in highly fair, all you actually said out loud at games, and that’s favoritism. That’s a good boy. Now go out
visible, highly scrutinized that E3 presentation was “Demons That’s, like, racist. there and talk about your game.
IllUSTRATIOn BY JUAn RAmIREz will be fairly simple. crowd went wild. me through your reasoning. I’m mATTHEW WASTElAnd writes about
You don’t have to try to talk
positions. So I’m pretty sure this
with Guns 2 is coming this winter.”
And they loved it. Right? The
Hey there, yeah...uh, I’m not
sure it makes perfect sense to
games and game development on
really sure why I’m here, to be
you. But let’s focus on how you
In that case, this should
his blog, Magical Wasteland (www.
honest. I already know how to
can express your opinion in a
go fast. Why don’t we begin by
magicalwasteland.com). email him at
conduct myself in front of an
pretending I’m a game journalist.
56 game developer | october 2012 way that— mwasteland@gdmag.com.