Page 34 - TheLeek_1

DECEMBER 23, 2018 BREAKING NEWS
After a two-year search for funding his border wall or “artistically designed steel slats,” President Trump’s dreams came true this morning, at least partially. After Mexico and U.S. taxpayers refused to be stiffed, the president’s senior adviser Jared Kushner made an emergency call
to his Saudi Arabian crush, Mohammed bin Salman a.k.a. MBS.
According to an off-the-record eavesdropper on the conversation, Jared and the “SamMan” — Jared’s nickname for MBS — spent the first five minutes gushing over how much they missed each other.
Their relationship has been tense since the murder of journalist-in-exile Jamal Khashoggi and SamMan’s adamant denial that he had any knowledge of it, or direct involvement in it. Jared believed MBS from the bottom of his heart, but their frequent phone chats were put on
ice until another diversion could be invented to dominate the news.
After a few pleasantries, Kushner gently broached the topic of wall funding, “SamMan, the president wants the border wall so bad, he can taste it. Is there any possible way you can part with a few billion to get it off — I mean, on the ground? I’ve checked with our banks in you-know-where; they are on board and willing to do anything we want. Are you tracking with me?”
“Ha, ha, my best dude, I can track you anywhere,” replied MBS.
“I cannot answer over phone. You must visit, no later than next week. I must see your — ahem — face in person if you understand, eh?”