Page 186 - ConvinceThemFlip

convince them in 90 seconds or less
Small talk is casual chitchat about nothing in particular,
but it greases the social wheels and enables people who
don’t know each other well (or at all) to learn about one
another in a safe, nonconfrontational way. It’s also easy to
do. You can start with softball comments about the weather.
Or you can ask about the person’s commute to wherever
you are. You can comment on sports or something that’s
taken place in the neighborhood, or offer a genuine compli-
ment on an unusual piece of clothing or accessory.
As you continue to interact, you might ask questions
about what the person likes to do in his spare time. Or
where she is from. You can chat about pop culture: the lat-
est celebrity scandal, a best-selling book, a hot new movie,
who’s going to win American Idol. An easy and natural com-
ment about the occasion or location followed by an open
question works wonders. You don’t need to agonize over
sparkling opening lines—just say something and then add a
tag question (“Isn’t it?” or “Don’t they?” or “Doesn’t it?”).
Keep the conversation light, and stay way from any-
thing political or sexual. Pick up on pointers and free
information (see page 185). Expand on what you already
know about each other. Talk about who you know and look
for common ground. Show you are genuinely interested.
Make sure the other person does at least half of the
talking. Remember to shut up and listen. Listen with your
eyes and your ears.
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