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The Red Well-Read Reader

Story 231

A Balk

If a pitcher were to commit a balk and

then, at the ump, in mock disbelief gawk

and backtalk – the fans might say: Take a

walk !

Then, e•jec•ted, off the mound the pitcher would

stalk.

Story 232

Whose Fault?

It’s not my fault, said fat boy Walt,

That I can neither jump or vault,

For I am unable to halt

My craving for spices like salt,

And sugar, especially in malt.

Story 233

The Schmaltzy Waltz

Debra Walts said to herself, “I enjoy music that’s lively, not

schmaltz! So why did I dance all night to schmaltz like the

Tennessee Waltz ? Now my feet must be soaked in Epsom

salts.”

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