Page 104 - The Ultimate Guidebook for Teens with Food Allergies

around. For example, at a restaurant, ensure that you are the one who asks questions and speaks with the server, chef, or manager.
Starting off by showing you’re responsible while your parents are present will allow them to feel more comfortable when you are dealing with situations on your own. When you do go out on your own, you may find it useful to be proactive and to explain to your parents exactly how you plan on handling your allergies wherever you are going. By doing this, they will realize that you have a good plan and they won’t feel the need to nag or question you.
If you are going to a party, for example, you might show your parents that you have your auto-injector in your pocket and tell them about the two friends you are going with who also know how to use your auto-injector. If you are going out for lunch with friends, you could tell them what restaurant you are going to, who you are going with, what you are planning on eating, and where you are carrying your auto-injector. While this may seem over-the-top, it can be very helpful for the first few times you go out alone since your parents can see that you are thinking about different aspects of the situation and that you are taking the necessary precautions.
If you are still finding that you are not being given enough responsibility, you may choose to have a conversation with your parents explaining why you feel that you can be more independent. When having a conversation like this, it is important to be respectful and try to see their perspective. Explain why you are responsible and in what situations you would appreciate more freedom. And ask them how you can best show them that you know how to manage your allergies in these situations.
The process of proving that you are responsible comes in two parts: The first part involves learning the skills required to actually BE responsible. And the second part involves demonstrating that you have these necessary skills. It may take some time before your parents let you manage everything on your own. But, by understanding their point of view and explaining to them how you will take responsibility in different situations, they will be more and more willing to give you independence.
Summary Tips
1) Want more independence from your parents? Prove that you can handle it!
2) Speaking about your allergies will show that you can advocate for yourself.
3) You will likely be asking about ingredients at restaurants for a long time. You might as well start early and get comfortable with it.