Page 81 - The Book of Rumi

The Night Watchmen and the Drunk

t was past midnight, and the night watchmen were patrolling the neighbor-
Ihood when they came across a drunk leaning up against a wall. One of
them walked up to the man, patted him on the shoulder, and screamed in his
ear: “Hey! Are you drunk? Tell me, quick, what have you been drinking?”
“Whatever was in that bottle over there,” the drunk said, pointing to an
empty bottle that had rolled away to the side.
“What was in the bottle? You know that alcohol is illegal in this town,”
yelled the watchman again.
“I drank what was in the bottle, offi cer,” replied the drunk, slurring his
words.
“I don’t see anything in the bottle; tell me, quickly, what did you drink?”
“What was in the bottle, I told you.”
The watchman realized that he was chasing his own tail and that conver-
sation with this man would be useless. He decided that if he wanted to arrest
the drunkard, he must try another approach.
“Open your mouth and say ah,” he ordered the drunk, by now half asleep,
hoping to smell the alcohol on his breath.
“Hu!” sighed the drunken man happily.
3
“I ordered you to say ah and you blurt out Hu?” snapped the angry guard.
“I’m ecstatic, why should I say ah? Ah is a sound for sad people like you
who’ve allowed their backs to get bent in two. People like me are always happy,
and that’s where my Hu comes from!”
“Don’t try to get out of this mess with your stupid rhetoric. I’m not
buying any of your false spirituality. No more arguing; stand up!” he ordered
with authority, knowing well that if he didn’t act fast he would soon be
outmaneuvered.
“That’s all right, you can go now; I’m done here,” said the drunk.
“I told you to get up! You’re drunk, and I must take you in.”
“Leave me alone. How do you expect to steal the clothing off a naked

3 Hu is one of the ninety-nine names for Allah.

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