Page 44 - Biblical Counseling I Textbook

• It means YOU initiate the reconciliation.
• It means you own your blame for the fracture.
• It means you do not hold back kindness.

True reconciliation will not allow you to say things like…
“I’ll forgive him, but I won’t be friends with him.”
“I’ve forgiven her, but I can’t trust her.”

Why be reconciled?

There may be no more powerful display of the gospel than going to reconcile with those who have wronged you!

When is reconciliation needed?
When someone has something against you (Matt. 5:23-24).

How do you know?
• Because you know what you did.
• Because he or she has told you.
• Because something is obstructing the relationship.

When you have something against someone (Matt. 18:15; Luke 17:3-4).
• You don’t need to go if you can let it go (1 Peter 4:8).
• But when you can’t let it go, you must go (Matt. 18:15, note the imperative).

What biblical actions must you take?
• You must let God examine you first (Matt. 7:1-5).
• You must go to the one who offended you (Matt. 18:15; Luke 17:3-4).
• You must correct with gentleness (Matt. 7:5; Gal. 6:1).
• If he repents, you must forgive and keep forgiving (Matt. 18:21-22; Luke 17:3-4).
What if the other person won’t reconcile?
• Reconciliation is not always possible (Rom. 12:18).
• God gives the church as the primary source of help when believers won’t reconcile (Matt. 18:15-17).

Connection and clear identification with a local church provides the protection
and accountability needed for healthy relationships.

Understanding the role of the church in disciplining her members

What is the nature of the relationships within the church?

We are in a bound relationship with God that is based on a covenant.
God has always related to His people through covenants (Noah, Abraham, Israel, David, etc.).

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