Page 11 - Labelle Gramercy, On the Case

Polished Off

“How about a sandwich? You must be hungry.”
The man turned on her, a half-crazed gleam in his eyes. I will not
repeat the more offensive of his remarks; their gist was that he did
not appreciate interference by anyone of her particular and imaginary
characteristics, and that his specific and quite reasonable demand was
for the insignificant sum of money necessary to achieve the unlikely
purpose of purchasing a bus ticket to the next town. Again I was
watching the wrong thing, this time the mendicant’s threatening
gesticulations. Suddenly the sandwich I had been unable to eat was in
the man’s right hand and he was limping out the door, assisted by the
detective as if she were a Girl Scout helping an old lady cross the
street.
By the time I caught up with her outside the café, the obnoxious
fellow was leaning against a lamppost, pushing the sandwich into his
mouth with one hand and rubbing his thigh with the other. I glanced
at my watch as we walked briskly and silently back to Bibliopoly. It
was barely one o’clock, but the hour felt considerably more
advanced.

<< 3 >>

Iris Call’s leathery face stretched as her mandibles shifted from
chewing gum to a fish sandwich. I waited patiently, bathing in the
clerk’s beneficent if cockeyed gaze. No doubt about the way to this
woman’s heart! Lieutenant Gramercy returned to her notebook and
what still looked like stock-taking to me.
“That really hit the spot,” said Iris, burping as she daintily dabbed
her lips with a torn-off scrap of wrapping paper. “That place has
good fries, real potatoes with peel and all and plenty of oil—not
reconstituted potato paste dried out under a heat lamp like
Burgermatic or Flembo’s. You know what I mean, P.G.?”
“Well, I can’t honestly say I remember the last time I patronized
either of those establishments, but I do regret not obtaining a more
complete, if not more balanced, meal for you, Iris.”
“No problem.” The gum returned from its parking place on the
side of the ancient cash register to its well-traveled route inside her
mouth. “Now I can think again. When are you going to read the will?
A girl needs to make plans, you know.”

10