Page 75 - The Myth and the Moment
P. 75

Evening

        are too much like high tea at the euthanasia clinic. Must be some little
        joint  along  Sunset  where  I  can  catch  a  bite.  Ah,  the  ubiquitous
        hamburger stand, now reveling in the euphemistic glory of ‘fast-food
        restaurant.’ An empty stool, a place at the altar of Moloch. Bring on
        the fatted calf—or its deep-fried by-products.
          “Give me a cheeseburger, fries, and a cup of coffee with cream.”
          “You mean a coffee light?”
          “Right.”
          Of  course,  you  teen-age  Neanderthal.  Why  would  I  mean
        something meaningless?  Pour any kind of white liquid you want into
        my  coffee;  meaning  applies  only  to  the  color,  the  surface  quality.
        Underneath, within, embedded in the matrix of everything formerly
        natural, are the slow poisons of petrochemistry.  Sometimes the faster
        poisons  of  radioactivity,  sometimes  the  instant  death  of  metallic
        pollutants.  The  young  have  adapted  to  their  artificial  environment
        with  a  new  fatalism;  I’ve  heard  it  in  a  dozen  different  ways:  ‘Hey,
        man, there’s so many things out there to get me, that, hey, what’s the
        difference?’ Live fast, die young, and leave a pretty corpse: the creed
        of nihilism. Was Jefferson right, do we need a revolution once every
        generation? Yes, if the inevitable reaction produces middle-America;
        no, if sooner or later, the right revolution occurs. Jefferson definitely
        did  not  foresee  the  destruction  of  public  education  by  the  ruling
        classes.  Another  short-sightedness.  Must  be  related  to  zero-sum
        notions of the earth’s bounty: I’ll get more by letting you have less;
        stay ignorant so you won’t know what you’re missing or who took it
        away from you. A nation of soda-jerks.
          Mm,  sustenance!  Sliding  across  Formica  in  a  Styrofoam
        sarcophagus. More salt? Turn into that pillar, yet. How long since a
        blood-pressure  test,  old  Nate?  Oh,  yeah,  that  trailer  parked  in  the
        shopping center; reading was useless, of course. Goes up and down,
        like everything else in the body. Down and up, perhaps, in the case of
        this food. No, got to keep it down and force the metabolism to feed
        the  brain.  Why  no  test  for  thought  pressure?  Tie  the  inner-tube
        around your head, pump it up and see how hard your mind can push
        back.  God,  my  energy  is  sapped.  Maybe  caffeine  will  goose  my
        nervous  system  into  some  useful  activity.  What  was  that  poem  I
        wrote:  something  about  how  the  nerves  are  supposed  to  act  like
        porpoises guiding a whale to  safety, but a few cups  of  coffee  turn

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