Page 26 - Fall 2019 inLEAGUE with Historic Theatre Resource Guide/Allied Member Directory
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Stop avoiding elephants in the room
As the year draws to a close, we are grateful for
our role in helping so many members restore Leaders often avoid addressing issues that are
their homes back to their original glory, sensitive or uncomfortable. For example, an em-
where we know communities will gather again soon.
ployee tells offensive jokes about gender, race or
sexual orientation, disrupting meetings with off-
beat humor. This behavior makes you cringe, but
then you justify why you’ve avoided the conver-
sation – for example, that he’s a great employ-
ee, never missed a day, is always on time and
doesn’t intend to be mean-spirited. Deep down,
you know you need the courage to course-cor-
rect this unwanted behavior.
We hope to see
you in person at What to do: Reflect back on how you have
enabled the behavior, whether it’s laughing or
the LHAT 2021 avoiding. Decide to stop enabling. The next time
annual conference, the behavior happens, pause, then question
and wish you a very Gary’s motive.
happy New Year!
It goes like this: “Gary, what’s your purpose for
telling that joke?” Then pause, remaining neutral.
It will feel awkward. Gary will say something like,
“I’m only joking.” This is where you make the shift.
You say, “Gary, you’re a great guy. I’m sure you
didn’t mean any harm, but when I hear that kind
www.stagesconsultants.com of joke I cringe. It’s disrespectful to women and
minorities.”
Conflict Resolution Gary may defend himself but stay the course
and own the part you played.
(conintued from page 16)
“Gary, I should have spoken up sooner. It’s not
Now that the behavior is about performance, fair to you that you are only hearing this now
culture and business objectives, it’s no longer your given that it’s been part of our culture, but I need
personal issue, it’s theirs. you to stop making jokes about anything that
puts another person down. Can I get your agree-
ment?”
What to do: Appeal to their self-interests. What
are their goals? What are their fears? For exam-
ple, if Paolo wants to advance from manager to Since you owned the part you played in en-
director, let him know he’ll get there faster if he abling, you can start with a clean slate to help
improves his communication skills. Let him know the employee make the needed shift willingly.
that aggressive behaviors are not tolerated in
leadership positions. Conclusion
As a leader, you need the courage and the skills
Get agreement from Paolo to help him increase to lead those who exhibit high-conflict behaviors.
his self-awareness. Suggest coaching to measure Remember, people do what they do because
improvements and give on the spot feedback. it works, and the person with clarity always navi-
When you appeal to their own self-interest, good gates the ship.
employees are willing to make the needed
changes to advance their career and elevate
their status.
PAGE 24 | INLEAGUE League of Historic American Theatres
