Page 58 - Sonoma County Gazette - May 2019
P. 58

   A Touchy-Feely Debacle...
Four or five people can be in the same place at the same time and hear something in four or five variations. I know that’s true when I get together with my siblings and we reminisce! (“I don’t remember THAT! That’s not what happened!”)
May 9 - Sep 26 ~ Heart Connection Group ~ Join the facilitated group to gain greater personal connection and learn to listen with compassion. $5, Free for Members. 1:30p-3p, Sebastopol Senior Center, 167 N. High Street, SEBASTOPOL, 707-829-2440, sebastopolseniorcenter.org/upcoming-workshops
May 9 - Jun 13 ~ Get to Know the Village ~ Learn how Village members and volunteers share their talents, support, fun, and friendship. Free, 10a, Village Network of Petaluma, 955 Petaluma Blvd. South, Petaluma, 707-776-6055, VillageNetworkofPetaluma.org, info@villagenetworkofpetaluma.org
May 1 - May 31 ~ Exercise Classes Offered at The SASC ~ Check out all of our wonderful exercise classes today! $8 members, $10 non-members, various days/times, Sebastopol Senior Center, 167 N. High St, Sebastopol, 707-829-2440, sebastopolseniorcenter.org/programs-classes
May 3 - May 31 ~ Senior Ballroom Dancing ~ Senior Ballroom dancing for the Month of May, a different band each week. Great time, Great music. $9, Sign in at the Person Senior Wing, Finley Center Auditorium Community Center, 2060 West College Ave., Santa Rosa
May 31 ~ Memorial Day BBQ - Age 50 plus ~ All-American BBQ lunch in the courtyard at the Person Senior Wing! Pre-reg required. Members Free, Non-Members $8, 11:30a Person Senior Wing - Finley Community Center, 2060 West College Avenue, Santa Rosa, 707-543-3745
Rides to Medical and Social Services Appointments ~ Call to arrange rides - FREE for members of the Cloverdale Senior Community Center, 311 North Main Street, Cloverdale, 707-894-4826 Elizabeth, cloverdaleseniorcenter.com
Memory can be tricky, and not just for seniors! That phenomenon comes to mind each time another person steps forward and into the media spotlight with a memory – real and accurate or embellished and revised – concerning what I’ll simplistically call an experience with human touch.
Recently, I drafted out a rough, free-fall piece targeting the issue of more and more persons coming forward with accusations and experiences (some decades old) that they describe with implications ranging over a very broad spectrum from really serious all the way to hardly believable as damaging. I gave copies to an equal number of men and women, and asked for feedback on how they feel about the subject. Yikes....
It’s a subject I have thought about before, but it came up sharply recently concerning incidents with Joe Biden and Beto O’Rourke. In Joe’s case, standing behind her, he’d put his hands on the shoulders of a young woman (who’d been working with the political group and all were celebrating something). He kissed the top of her head, and, he says, whispered thank you in her ear. Beto’s bad move was to say that his wife was at home taking care of the children, which he helped with when he could!
 Sebastopol Area Senior Center 167 N. High St.Sebastopol, 707-829-2440, sebastopolseniorcenter.org
May 1 - May 24 ~ Join your Sebastopol Area Senior Center today! ~ We would love to have you become a member of your Senior Center. Sebastopol Senior Center, 167 N. High Street, Sebastopol, 707-829-2440, sebastopolseniorcenter.org/
Blood Pressure and Glucose Screening - 3rd Thursdays, 12-1 p.m. *when volunteers are available. Suggested Fee: $3 Wisdom Counts Member; $4 Assoc.Members
Rides To Appointments ~ Over 60, live in the West County and need a ride to medical and social service appointments? CALL five business days in advance of your appointment, Dean Brittingham, 707-829-2440 or emaildean@ sebastopolseniorcenter.org.
The negative reactions to those two men really bothered
me! They were surprised and intimidated by the outrage, and Beto actually apologized. Joe said he couldn’t apologize for the gestures because “...that’s just me, I’m a warm, expressive guy...” He said he was sorry the woman felt uncomfortable, and he’d be careful in the future. Much ado for two simple incidents? One was a compliment of appreciation to his wife; one a harmless gesture of... what? Thanks? Affection? Appreciation?
Doesn’t maligning (and sometimes ruining men’s reputations)
with questionable accusations cheapen the real incidents that
Speaking of sexual aggression, we women have developed and elevated the techniques to an absolute art! I often wonder how short the skirt, how much cleavage, how much verbal innuendo, how much body language do you think should qualify for a man to make a charge of sexual harassment by one of
have truly harmed many women?
Senior Dining Sites Council on Aging 30 Kawana Springs Road, Santa Rosa, 707-525-0143. 60 and over Donation of $4.00 Reservation must be made 24 hours in advance
Cloverdale ~ Cloverdale Senior Community Center, 311 North Main St., Mon.-Fri., 12p, 707-894-4826, cloverdaleseniorcenter.com
Bethlehem Tower ~ 801 Tupper, SR, 707-525-0143, M.,W., 12p
First United Methodist Church ~ 2150 Giffen Ave., SR., 707-525-0143, Mon.-Fri., 12p
Healdsburg Senior Center ~ 133 Matheson St., 707-525-0143 M.,T.,W., 12p
Rohnert Park Senior Center ~ 6800 Hunter Dr., Ste. A, 707-525-0143 Mon. - Fri., 12p
Russian River Senior Center, 15010 Armstrong Woods Rd, Guerneville, 707-869-0618, Debra Rianda 12 - 2p every Wednesday & Friday
Sebastopol Senior Center ~ 167 High St., 707-525-0143, M.,W., F., 12p
Silvercrest Senior Housing ~ 1050 3rd St., SR, Margaret DeMaria, 707-525-0143, 11a
us? Or, do we girls want to split the hair and claim: Well... I didn’t touch him! (...which we also do.) (Hmmm..... sweet memories of fighting the double standard.)
What do we think is happening? I received A LOT of heated feedback from my tester piece. Some men feel that basic, healthy flirting has become almost a crime, and stressed that they now go to extremes to be politically correct. Some women are annoyed by women who seem to be opportunists seeking that 15 minutes of fame over trivialities – while still others suffer
in silence with real, horrific experiences to remember. And, when they come forward, they are often not believed and suffer a second humiliation.
(By what seems to me to be a simplistic, new criteria, all my uncles, grandfathers, father, male family friends, most of my male clients and definitely all of my male friends should be prosecuted. Fortunately for many of them, they are dead!)
 Senior Social Clubs Contact Laurel Anderson at 707-525-0143 ext. 103, atlanderson@councilonaging.com
Santa Rosa Senior Social Club at First United Methodist Church, 2150 Giffen, Santa Rosa, Mon., Wed., and Fri. 9:30-2p.
Sonoma Senior Social Club at Vintage House, 264 First St. E., Sonoma - Tues. and Thur. from 9:30-2p.
Healdsburg Senior Social Club at St. Paul’s Church, 209 Matheson St., Healdsburg, Mon., Tues., and Wed., 9:30-2, Contact Roxanne Lemereis at 707-433-6161.
Sebastopol Senior Social Club at Sebastopol Senior Cntr, 167 No. High St., Sebastopol, Mon., Wed. and Fri. 9:30-2p.
I wonder about the touchy-feely aspect of being Italian American – we hug and touch and grown sons still kiss their mom on the lips! (Have you tried telling an Italian NOT to hug?)
The subject is almost too hot to handle, and maybe not suited for even a little levity. I hesitated to launch. But if nothing else, I am hopeful it can, at least, be a thought-piece.
 Zoë Tummillo is a Business & Marketing Consultant/Trainer/Commercial Writer, dba COMMUNICATION CONCEPTS, in private practice since 1974. In addition to Commercial work, she writesSenior Momentum: A Series of Situations; “Pieces of My Path. essay memoirs of growing up first-generation Italian American; andSenior Momentum: Front And Center!. Email Zoë at writingservice@earthlink.net
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