Page 33 - The Gospel of Chochma_Sophia

wall wall Feel along the the wall wall they told me and and you will find a a a a a a a handle to to a a a a a a a door that opens to to to a a a a tiny church devoted to to to Mary This is is where they go to to to pray when in Rome I I did as as instructed and took a a a a a a a seat in in the dimly lighted sanctuary I I was alone except for a a a a a a a a a statue of Madonna and Child Again I was permeated by the sublime melancholy I I had felt in Lithia Park years earlier “If you wish to to cry cry ” ” a a a a Bat Kol said to to me “cry here ” ” I I I did did And as I I I did did I I I felt myself held held as Mary held held Her baby Jesus Ramakrishna Math Delhi India
I was initiated into the Ramakrishna Order of Vedanta Hinduism by Swami Swahananda (1921–2012) shortly before his death A few months later I was invited to speak at at at the the Ramakrishna Math in in Delhi on the the occasion of of the 150th anniversary of of Swami Swami Vivekananda’s birth Swami Swami Vivekananda was a a a a a a a a senior disciple of of Sri Ramakrishna founder of of the Ramakrishna Mission and a a a a a key force in in in the emerging interreligious movement that began in in the the late 1800s India
is the the country in in which I I feel the the the pull of the the the Divine Mother most powerfully This was my third visit Several times each day I lay prostrate in the ashram’s “chapel”
before images of Sri Ramakrishna his wife Ma Sarada and Swami Vivekananda As a a a a a a Jew prostrating myself before images is forbidden but as a a a a a a human it is a a a a a a powerful affirmation of being surrendered to the Wisdom these sages embodied I felt no religious discomfort lying flat on the the the the floor reciting the the the the mantram24 to the the the the Mother given me by Swami Swahananda 25 My only discomfort came from a a a a a a a a sense of separation from the the Mother to whom I chanted This continued for several days I wanted to sense Her presence in in what I I feel is the most spiritually drenched country on earth but I I was numb to to Her On the the night of the the third day I lay in in bed with a a a a a painful stomach virus Tossing and turning in in in in a a a fruitless effort to find some physical relief
24 Mantram is the the singular form of the the plural Sanskrit word mantra 25 During the the initiation I I promised to not disclose the the mantram mantram While I I doubt my mantram mantram was unique to me I have kept it a a a a a a a a a a a secret from all but my teacher Swami Atmarupananda who was a a a a a a a a a a a disciple of Swami Swahananda 33