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A12 BUSINESS
Wednesday 28 september 2022

Millennial Money: How to help loved

ones deal with debt

By LAUREN SCHWAHN of
NerdWallet
Juan Pinon, an electrical
engineer in McAllen, Texas,
struggled with credit card
debt for years. It wasn’t
until he confided in his sis-
ter that he began to turn
things around.
“It just so happened that
one day I opened up to my
sister, and she confessed
to me that she had debt
issues and was able to get
out through professional The likeness of Benjamin Franklin is seen on U.S. $100 bills,
help,” Pinon says. Thursday, July 14, 2022, in Marple Township, Pa.
Getting a vetted referral to Associated Press
a nonprofit credit counsel-
ing agency and encour- needs to be entered into sion in return.
agement from someone very carefully,” says Brandy SHARE KNOWLEDGE AND
he trusted convinced him Baxter, an accredited fi- RESOURCES
to take action. Pinon en- nancial counselor in Dallas. If your loved one is ready to
rolled in the agency’s debt “It needs to have a lot of dig out of debt, help them
management program grace, and it needs to be take the next step. You
and paid off about $50,000 in an environment where can talk to them about the
in less than three years. the person feels relaxed.” emotions that might be in-
It’s difficult to watch peo- If you’ve been in a similar fluencing their spending
ple we care about struggle position, consider telling behavior, explore different
with debt. Debt can disrupt your loved one. Drawing on debt payoff methods or
their financial and personal your own experience with look over their expenses.
lives, as well as the lives of debt and acknowledging “Maybe you come togeth-
those around them. As a the emotions involved can er and say, ‘OK, here’s how
close friend or family mem- help you come at it from I do my budget. Let’s work
ber, your influence can be an empathetic place. on how you do your bud-
powerful enough to spark “We can use ourselves as get. Or here’s how I’ve set
change. How can you help an example to say, ‘Hey, I up my spending plan. Let’s
others avoid falling further was there, I understand. I’m work on setting your spend-
into debt, especially as the not trying to put you on the ing plan,’” Baxter says.
expensive holiday season spot. I myself went through But not everyone feels
inches closer? Here’s what this embarrassment. Please comfortable letting their
you can do to help a loved let me help you,’” Pinon friends and family dig into
one deal with debt. says. the nitty-gritty details of
PROCEED WITH CAUTION RESPECT THEIR REFUSAL FOR their financial lives. Besides,
Unlike Pinon, people with HELP not all of us have the nec-
debt won’t always raise Your friend or family mem- essary expertise to take a
the issue themselves. Bring- ber might shut the conver- do-it-yourself approach.
ing up someone else’s sation down. That’s OK. “Of course, there’s always
personal financial matters “Debt can be addictive, the professionals avail-
can feel like overstepping just like any other addic- able to help,” Ellywicz says.
a boundary. If you think tion. The person that’s in “Sometimes, even just giv-
it’s important to intervene, the cycle may not see ing a referral is a lot of help
be strategic about setting anything wrong, and so to a family member.”
the right tone. The first step they may not be ready for Come prepared with a list
should be asking if they’re help,” Baxter says. of trustworthy resources,
open to the conversation, Ultimately, you have to ac- such as online tools, non-
says Kathryn Ellywicz, a mar- cept that it’s their life and profit organizations and
keting and communica- their decision. Let your financial counselors. (Non-
tions specialist and former friend or relative know you profits, such as credit coun-
counselor at GreenPath, respect their choice and seling agencies, typically
a nonprofit credit counsel- you’ll be ready to help if offer lower-cost or free ser-
ing agency. Giving them a they change their mind. vices and meet certifica-
choice may prevent them Baxter says you can also tion requirements for qual-
from feeling ambushed. use this as an opportu- ity and ethical standards.)
If they’re willing to discuss nity to reset boundaries. Then, pass along your rec-
their debt situation, speak If you’ve been providing ommendations. Here’s a
kindly and withhold judg- financial support for them start: The Association for Fi-
ment. “A lot of times, our and no longer feel com- nancial Counseling & Plan-
family members feel shame fortable doing so, explain ning Education offers free
around financial debt. So the circumstances and ask virtual financial counseling
it’s a conversation that them to respect your deci- and coaching sessions. q