Page 26 - The Intentional Parent

Chapter Two Actions
T here are thousands of parenting intentions like the examples I gave in the last section, but by comparison there are very few parenting actions you can take. The
trick is finding an effective action to take in a given situation -- like when to address a behavior, when to ignore it, when to bring it up later, when to issue a consequence, etc.
Here is my short list of parenting actions which every parent should know how to employ:
• offer a choice
• say no (offer no choice)
• set a limit
• communicate an expectation • apply a consequence
• reward a behavior
• model a behavior
• provide information
• ignore a behavior/do nothing • provide non-contingent love
Sometimes more than one action fits an intention so don’t put pressure on yourself to always find a perfect fit between action and intention. Sometimes there are better actions to take than others depending on the circumstances. Sometimes a parenting intention requires more than one action. What I am telling you is this is not something you need to be perfectionistic about. Utilizing the techniques above is what provides purpose to your intentions.
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 26