Page 93 - The Intentional Parent

Turning Intentions Into Actions
Reinforcement and modeling go hand in hand. Children tend to model behavior that is rewarded, and they also model behavior that is rewarded in others. Unfortunately, there is a negative side to this. Children will model behavior that is often socially rewarded by their peers like bullying and aggression.
So, when you consider how “observational learning” influences your kids you have to factor influences like:
• social media
• traditional media
• who your kids are playing with and associating with in their peer
group
• the social culture of the school they are attending
• the influences of other adults who play important roles in the
lives of your children like teachers, religious leaders, coaches, babysitters, extended family members, etc.
It is the sum of influences that your children come under that determines who they will copy and imitate. It can become a very delicate process to steer your children away from those influences that are unsavory.
The best advice I can give parents in this regard is not to be afraid to place rules and limits on environments that can have a bad influence, even if it means your kids will act as if they don’t like you. You are supposed to me smarter and more wise than they are. Act that way, and they might not like you, but they will respect you.
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 93