Page 5 - KOG Glory & Grace, Issue 10: Voices

After high school, Gay studied at the University of Montana and then began an internship in medical technology in Great Falls. "I was responsible for running all the lab tests" Gay explains, remarking that listening to the radio was common in the lab. In fact, Gay was almost kicked out of internship for singing along with the radio while at the microscope. "I guess people assumed I was not serious about my profession. But in truth, I just loved singing to the radio," she shares. In a short time, the radio was about to become a bigger part of her life than she ever imagined.
When making plans for the weekend, unbeknownst to Gay, two acquaintances from high school were planning a party. One friend said to another, "do you remember Gay Darkenwald from high school? She's in Great Falls now. David, why don't I set you up?" Though Gay and David had crossed paths working on a play at Senior High, they "met again" that weekend and Gay's record collection caught David's eye. Within six weeks they were engaged and two weeks after that Gay and David were married.
It wasn't until 1990 (or thereabouts) when Gay considered choral singing once again. She was hesitant to join the KOG choir because of her high school experience, but was intrigued because there were already three women tenors in the choir! Gay remembers being encouraged by those women, especially one tenor named Joyce Chamberlain, who helped her find her voice once again. Now, for more than 30 years Gay has been a proud "tenor, sliding into baritone" in the KOG Choir.
Six years ago Gay was diagnosed with breast cancer which began a season of living burdened by medical concerns. After responding to the cancer, heart valve trouble was diagnosed and upon further review, the presence of an aortic aneurysm was discovered. A series of complicated surgeries took place, including a transcatheter aortic valve replacement (TAVR) in January 2019. Gay was hospitalized for two weeks.
Following this big surgery (where two of her three surgeons were part of the KOG community), Gay was alarmed to realize that her voice was gone. "It didn't bother me that I couldn't talk," Gay shares, "David and I joked that he now had the 'perfect marriage'" because of losing her voice.
In addition to dealing with the physical pain of recovering, Gay notes that “not being able to sing was what really bothered me.” “I hated coming to worship services when I couldn’t sing," Gay remembers. "Everyone else could sing and I couldn’t.” Even one of her most joyful pastimes, singing in the car, was put on hold. Gay's voice didn't return for six months.
Gratefully, Gay can now sing once again. Though she still has lingering breathing problems (COPD) and uses an inhaler, she delights that she and David are both continuing to sing in the choir. "Music has the power to change my mood," Gay says, "and it helps me through difficult times."
When asked what she would say to someone considering finding their own voice with the KOG Choir, Gay shares:
"Do it. We are a welcoming, fun group. All are welcome. We have extremely talented people and people like me who aren’t. There’s tremendous joy possible.”