Page 2 - Nellis Creech NTTR Bullseye 4-22-16

2 April 22, 2016
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#NotJustApril: Know your part, do your part
By Lorinda Pirrie
Peterson Air Force Base Sexual Assault Response
coordinator
PETERSON AIR FORCE AIR FORCE
BASE, Colo. — Working in the field of
sexual assault prevention and response, it’s
presumable that I think about the subject
more frequently than the average person.
As such, my children have been subjected
to a plethora of discussions regarding
risk reduction and effective bystander
intervention — far too many “lectures” if
you ask them.
In fact, before my daughter left for col-
lege, she and her five closest friends gath-
ered in my living room to discuss dorm
room decorating ideas, class schedules,
sororities and other important college
freshman issues. As I eavesdropped on
their conversation and observed their
Please give tomorrow a chance
By Chief Master Sgt. Steve K. McDonald
ACC Command Chief
LANGLEY AIR FORCE BASE, Va.—
In March 1983, I was 16 years old and a
senior in high school. I had a sister who
was 17 and a brother who just turned
19. Through interesting circumstances,
we were all seniors together. On March
4, 1983, my brother committed suicide.
That was a tough time for our family. I
have always wondered how different my
life would be if I still had a big brother.
This letter is an attempt to get people
to realize that permanent actions to
temporary problems may have lasting
effects on others. To think that everyone
would be better off without an individual
is just wrong. The future holds so much
promise. There is always hope. Please give
tomorrow a chance.
Dear Steve,
Hey, how have you been? It has been a
while. I wanted to just take a moment to
tell you that I am sorry. I know that, by
now, you have probably moved on with
life and I may be nothing more than a
passing thought or an occasional men-
tion in a conversation. But I can’t help
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Commentary
enthusiasm and excitement, it occurred to
me that statistically one of these vibrant
young women could likely be a victim of
sexual assault.
According to the Rape, Abuse and
Incest National Network, 1 out of every 6
American women will be the victim of an
attempted or completed rape at some point
in her lifetime. Let’s think about this for a
minute. Picture six women you know: 1
in 6. Picture your unit’s holiday party, a
family reunion, or a retirement ceremony:
1 in 6. Your softball team, bowling league,
or scrapbooking club: 1 in 6.
As my son prepares to enlist in the Air
Force, it also occurs to me that at least
one young man in his basic training flight
might be the victim of sexual assault.
RAINN reports that 1 in 33 American men
will be the victim of an attempted or com-
pleted rape at some point in his lifetime.
but wonder what our lives would have
been like if I didn’t make that decision.
What would I be doing? I wonder what
kind of job I would have? Would I have
a family like yours with an amazing wife
and wonderful children? What would my
children be doing? I can almost imagine
having a little girl and seeing her grow up
into a beautiful young lady. Or maybe a
son who grew up to be a baseball player
and we could have spent time playing
catch. You do remember that I liked
playing baseball, don’t you? You probably
also remember we played football when
we were younger. Oh the days when we
were young and our major concerns were
fighting fights we could win and getting
the cutest girlfriend. Sorry, I am getting
away from the reason I wanted to write.
It’s just so easy to wonder what my life
would have been. But of course, all I can
do is wonder. now, does it? Maybe if we didn’t fight so
I know that what I did doesn’t make a
lot of sense. I was just dealing with some
things that would have been hard to ex-
plain. I know I made some bad choices
and that kind of caught up with me. It’s
hard to believe I could make that big of
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The media would have me believe
that he is at a much higher risk in the
military, yet the statistics would suggest
otherwise. Neither one of my children is
at higher risk than the rest of our society
simply because of their career path. This
crime does not discriminate and knows
no boundaries. It can occur regardless of
gender, rank, age, race, religion, income,
ability, profession, ethnicity or sexual
orientation.
There is a good chance that someone
you know has been or may be sexually
assaulted in their lifetime, yet 68 percent
of victims will not report the crime. If a
survivor trusts you enough to share their
experience, how will you respond? Will
you believe them? Will you be empathic
and supportive? Social norms often direct
questions of clothing choices, alcohol
consumption or promiscuity; will you
a mess of my life in only 19 years. I know
we all had our problems growing up. Dad
was hard on us. But you know as well as
I do that he had a rough life. Maybe if
his life was different, mine would have
turned out different as well. Sorry, there I
go wondering again. I know I can’t blame
my choice on him.
As I was saying, I was going through a
tough time. I didn’t think I could talk to
you. You seemed to have a better handle
on things and I am not sure you would
have understood what I was facing. We
had just had a fight a couple of weeks
before. Why did we fight so much? Seems
like there was way too much fighting go-
ing on in our house. We were some stub-
born kids. Remember that time we got in
a fight because you wanted to change the
TV channel? Doesn’t seem so important
much, we would have talked more. Wow,
I did it again. Our fighting didn’t force
me into my decision...it was my decision
alone. I will try to stay on track here. looked beyond that Sunday morning.
My point is that I am extremely sorry
for what I did. It was selfish. I wasn’t
thinking about dad, mom, Sheila or you.
status, physical handicap, political affiliation or any other
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dare to challenge those norms, to hold
offenders, not survivors, accountable for
their actions?
The Peterson AFB objective during
Sexual Assault Awareness and Preven-
tion Month (and all year round) is to
focus on creating the kind of culture
that does not accept sexual assault or
any acts of interpersonal violence. This
requires a personal commitment from all
service members at every level, our civil-
ian counterparts, as well as our families
and friends. Together, we can collectively
take action to promote safety, respect and
equality. We all have a part in combating
sexual assault and April offers an excel-
lent opportunity to focus attention on
our individual roles. You speak with your
actions. What are you saying?
Know your part. Do your part.
#NotJustApril
I was just thinking about me and I didn’t
want to deal with stuff anymore. I know
that my decision had a huge impact on
your life....on all of your lives. Your life
is different because of what I did. I know
mom doesn’t understand why I did it. I
can only imagine how much it hurt her.
Especially knowing the situation with
her own dad. I robbed all of you. I robbed
mom and dad of a son. I robbed you and
Sheila of a big brother. I robbed your
children of an uncle. I probably would
have been a good uncle. Oh man, I almost
forgot about Jimmy. You remember he
was the one that found me. I don’t even
want to think about the impact of that
initial sight on his life. That wasn’t fair. I
should not have done that.
I wish I could go back in time but
that’s not possible. I wish I would have
realized that those things I was deal-
ing with weren’t going to last forever.
So many people go through so much
worse and make it. I wish I would have
I wish I would have realized that I had
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