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The Art of Procrastination: A Humorous Guide
“In delay there lies no plenty”
A phrase that resonates with many yet often falls on ¾ The “Research Phase”: Spend
deaf ears. As a seasoned procrastinator, I’ve mastered hours gathering unnecessary
the art of delaying tasks until the last minute. In this information to feel prepared.
tongue-in-cheek guide, I’ll share my insight on how to ¾ The “Perfectionist Trap”: Set
perfect the art of procrastination, followed by some tips unrealistically high standards,
on how to break the cycle & take control of your time. ensuring you’ll never start.
Step 1: The Initial Excuse : Jokes apart, you can’t really waste
Saksham
Class- XII A
Begin by reassuring yourself that there’s plenty of all your precious time, therefore CRPF Public School, Dwarka
time to complete the task. Say it out loud: “I’ll do it... break the Procrastination Cycle by
wait... not now... just a minute.” This sets the tone for
a productive procrastination session, allowing you to ¾ Setting clear goals and deadlines
delay the inevitable with confidence. ¾ Breaking tasks into smaller, manageable chunks
¾ Creating a schedule and sticking to it
Step 2: The Distraction Game : Find creative ways to ¾ Removing distractions (turn off notifications, log
divert your attention: out of social media)
¾ Rewarding yourself for completing tasks on time
¾ Scroll through social media ¾ Seeking accountability (study groups, friends, or
¾ Watch a funny video mentors)
¾ Take an extended snack break ¾ Practicing self-compassion (don’t be too hard on
¾ Reorganize your desk (again) yourself when you slip up)
Step 3: The Deadline Denial : Convince yourself that Procrastination is an art that requires dedication and
the deadline is manageable: “Don’t worry, it’s an hour practice. While I don’t recommend making it a habit,
away.” This reassurance will calm your nerves and allow acknowledging its presence can help you manage it.
you to continue procrastinating. Remember, “In Delay, there lies no plenty.” So, the next
time you find yourself procrastinating, just smile and
Step 4: The Panic Mode : As the deadline looms closer, say: “I’m honing my skills.” Then, take a deep breath
panic sets in. Your mind races: “Oh no, I couldn’t submit and dive into the task in hand!
it on time!” This is the critical moment when you must
decide: will you finally start working, or perfect your
procrastination skills?
Well in a world of 8 billion people you need to
differentiate yourself from other procrastinators, Don’t
you? For that follow these Advanced Procrastination
Techniques:
The “5-Minute Rule”: Promise yourself you’ll
start working in just 5 minutes. Repeat this process
indefinitely.
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