Page 6 - ALGBTIC News Magazine - Fall 2019

Irish, and German mother, I could see that they were would celebrate when they discovered a Two-Spirit
incredibly different in almost all perceptible ways. My person among them. These individuals were seen as
father had a calm, silent, warm demeanor – much akin blessed with both a masculine and feminine spirit
to a calm stream of water; and my mother had (and still within them, a perfect harmony of gender, and took a
has) a fiery, bubbling, pertinacious personality – more respected place within each tribe. Although each tribe
akin to a lava eruption. Being part of both of them had different terms for these identities, these indi-
brought me confusion as to how this intersection ex- viduals were seen as socially and spiritually gifted;
pressed itself within me, and where I actually fit into a blend of the divine masculine and feminine, they
our world. As I grew older, I became more aware of were able to view issues from multiple perspectives.
differences as I realized my gender was variant and I In indigenous society, we were respected leaders,
was bisexual. Growing up in a conservative and disaf- spiritual advisors, and caretakers of children, elderly,
firming religious environment, I also was aware of how and the infirm. This began to change my perspective
many people perceived differences in a negative way. on being a misfit; Being a misfit was our gift; we
When my brother came out as gay, I saw the rejection were the remedy that this world needed.
and struggles that he experienced. Although I did not
feel that I could speak to the adults in my life about my Although the label of two-spirit is restricted to those
own affectional and gender identity, since I graduat- with indigenous heritage, I believe the spirituality
ed high school at a young age, I was able surrounding two-spirit philosophy is true for all of us
to find a more affirming environ- who are part of the Queer and Trans community.
ment at college with my peers. Recent research has actually sup-
ported this philosophy; we
With all of the different elements are born with higher social
of my background, and with the and emotional skills, higher
experiences I have had, I began levels of empathy, and a higher
to feel like a misfit within any capacity for leadership. We
environment. I was not Native ARE misfits in a broken world;
OR White, I was not gay OR and we are meant to bring about
heterosexual, I was not com- healing to our families, our com-
pletely female OR male, I was a young munities, and our culture.
kid around college students, and I considered
myself smart but was very sheltered. As a survivor of Now, as a professor, a Licensed
sexual assault and religious-based trauma, I also found Professional Counselor, a practicing yogi, and a
that it was difficult to truly and authentically open up parent to a son with sensory processing sensitivity
to others. I was, as all of us are, an intersectional being and a trans daughter, I no longer feel like being a mis-
with numerous identities and lived experiences. I was fit is negative – I know beyond a shadow of a doubt
always fearing rejection and the inevitable pain that that my true purpose on this earth is inextricably
accompanies it. related to my affectional and gender identity, as well
as all of my other intersectional identities and lived
After counseling, finding a community, and furthering experiences. I am all of these things united, no one
my education, a lot of things definitely got better; but identity less significant than the others.
I admit, that I still commonly felt like a misfit. Being
bisexual, I was not always welcomed into the queer However, along the way, we have often experienced
community. Even in my doctorate program, I felt out trauma and rejection in a world that no longer re-
of place, as a kid who grew up poor, biracial, bisexual, spects our blessed presence. As a result, this trauma
genderqueer, and a first-generation college student. can keep us from approaching the world with a com-
pletely open heart. We lose our perspective and our
When I began to be more connected with my Native an- connection to our collective wisdom of our heritage.
cestry, I learned about Two-Spirit communities. Native We can very easily turn against other marginalized
culture, prior to colonization, recognized variant gender people or our allies, or even those within the queer
and affectional identities as a blessing to the tribe and community. Just because we understand our own