Page 101 - What Is Not Yours Is Not Yours

presence

ill Akkerman’s husband had been wanting to have a talk with her for weeks,
J and she was 200 percent sure that it was going to be an unpleasant one. The
signs were subtle, but she was a psychologist. So was he; she’d been warned that

this would probably be her toughest marriage. In the month before their summer
holiday he was so busy that she hardly saw him at home, and when he was in she
used the unofficial zoning of their household to postpone the talk. No harsh
words were to be said in bed, or in the kitchen. Neither of them had made these
rules, but since this had somehow become part of their code of conduct, Jill and
Jacob continued to do their bit toward keeping their meals and their dreams
untainted. Conversation in the bedroom and kitchen tended toward the

lighthearted, so she stuck to those rooms as often as possible when she wasn’t at
work. Jacob had had the house renovated to her wishes; there weren’t many
changes, just the addition of a few extra doorways. She preferred rooms with a
minimum of two doorways, so you had options. You didn’t have to go out the
same way you came in. In the bedroom she moved from the bed to the floor and
back again with her books and gadgets. Sex was out of the question. He didn’t

even raise the question, just watched her with a glint of amusement in his eyes.
In the kitchen she cleaned diligently and sharpened knives until they broke.
Jacob bought more and presented them to her with witty asides she heard only
dimly beneath the louder fear that he might add: “Can I see you in the living
room for a minute?”

—

HE DID CATCH her in the living room once but she ran so fast around the edge of
the room and out of the nearest door that she toppled and broke a painted jug
they’d chosen together on their honeymoon.
Jill wouldn’t have minded receiving some advice but ultimately opted not to
mention this situation to anybody outside of the marriage. Not to her own

therapist and certainly not to Lena or Sam. Jacob was about to leave her. She