Page 140 - I Live in the Slums: Stories (The Margellos World Republic of Letters)

EUPHORIA

Ms. Wen sat in a dark room pondering the structure of the universe. Then she
stood and opened the window, whereupon all kinds of dark shadows wandered

in. The room turned half-light, half-dim. Poo, poo, poo . . . came the noises from
the shadows. Ms. Wen felt herself sinking; the ceiling and four walls were
scattering in all directions. Ms. Wen wasn’t suspended in the air, however.
Rather, she stood firmly on Mother Earth, all kinds of things clustered tightly
around her. She didn’t feel as if she was tied up, though; instead, she felt
pleasantly free.
“You’re on the second floor facing southwest. It’s the room with an apple on
the windowsill. It’s a medium-size room with simple furniture and a typewriter.”
The voice came from a tape recorder.
“Thank you for telling me where I am. But who are you?” Ms. Wen was
puzzled.
“I’m your friend. You don’t have to know my name, because we’re in touch
with each other only inside this building. This has nothing to do with the outside
world.”
These words must have been recorded in advance. How odd! Now she was
going to do some deep breathing exercises. Each time she inhaled, the shadows

also rapidly flew into her nostrils, and her body sank continuously and slowly.
During this process, Ms. Wen always wanted to know where she was—Where
was she in this “cosmic building”? Was she facing west? But the recorder
wouldn’t respond to her questions very often. So she was puzzled most of the
time. It was okay to be puzzled, but she did long to be oriented. The answer
would come from the recorder sooner or later. When it came, it always happened
unexpectedly, and it made her feel fantastic. She loved what was going on inside
the cosmic building. The walls and ceiling had scattered—Wasn’t that true? The
voice from the recorder made it clear that she was in a “medium-size room”
located “on the second floor,” “facing southwest.” These descriptions couldn’t
indicate any place outdoors. But she also kept sinking; she couldn’t remain
inside a room. It was really hard to decide where she was. How wonderful to be

in this delicate uncertain state! Maybe she was simultaneously in both the south
and the north, but the announcement was always clear, making her feel that she
could depend upon this reality.
Years earlier, Ms. Wen had looked forward to this kind of exercise. She had