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Diversity in U.S. Families  387

                 longer my stepmother) is pregnant, and soon we all will have a new brother or sister. Or
                 will it be a half brother or half sister?
                   If you can’t figure this out, I don’t blame you. I have trouble myself. It gets very com-
                 plicated around Christmas. Should we all stay together? Split up and go to several other
                 homes? Who do we buy gifts for, anyway?

              Gay and Lesbian Families

              Most gay and lesbian couples lack legal rights to support their relationship. As I write   Watch on MySocLab
              this, 13 states allow same-sex marriages, 35 states prohibit them, and the laws of two   Video: Thinking Like a
              states are ambiguous (“U.S. Supreme Court. . .” 2013). A handful of U.S. states     Sociologist: Same-Sex
              allow people of the same sex to marry, but 41 states have laws that prohibit same-sex   Marriage
              marriages. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled in 2013 that the federal government cannot
              deny benefits to same-sex married couples but did not rule on the constitutionality of
              laws that ban same-sex marriage.
                 What are same-sex relationships like? Researchers have found that the main struggles
              of same-sex couples are housework, money, careers, problems with relatives, and sexual
              adjustment (Blumstein and Schwartz 1985). If these sound familiar, they should, as they
              are the same problems that heterosexual couples face. A major difference is that many
              same-sex couples face a stigma, sometimes accompanied by discrimination. As you can
              imagine, this complicates a couple’s relationship.
                 Just as with heterosexual couples, for same-sex couples, marriage is a big step. No
              longer is the relationship a casual thing. Instead, it becomes immersed in legal ties
              and obligations. Like others, gay and lesbian couples who marry hope that marriage
              will make their relationship even more solid. One problem that same-sex couples face
              is social acceptance, including acceptance by their families of origin. Researchers have
              found that after marriage, most families of origin are more accepting of the couple.
              Surprisingly, though, in some instances, the marriage brings less acceptance (Ocobock
              2013). Apparently, some disapproving relatives had told themselves that their son,
              daughter, nephew, or niece was not in a sexual relationship with “the friend”—even
              though the couple had been living together for years. When the couple married, the
              relatives could no longer keep up this pretense, and the relationship with the family of
              origin fell apart.
                 As with heterosexual couples, same-sex relationships also sour—and for all the same   After years of struggle, including
              reasons: disagreements about sex, how to spend money, how to rear children, romantic   numerous court cases and lobbying of
                                                                                              legislatures, the U.S. Supreme Court
              triangles, and so on. Since about 30 percent of lesbian couples and 17 percent of gay   ruled that federal benefits apply
              couples are rearing children, breakups                                          equally to gay couples.
              bring the usual problems of custody and
              visitation (Gartrell et al. 2011).
                 Except for the sex of the individuals,
              same-sex and heterosexual relationships
              are quite similar. There is no “exotic dif-
              ference” that some people expect to exist.
              Major differences center on social accep-
              tance and discrimination.
              Adoption by Gay and Lesbian Couples.
              Adoption by same-sex couples has been a
              hot-button issue across the United States.
              A fear of heterosexuals is that children
              reared by same-sex parents will be pres-
              sured into becoming homosexuals (Lewin
              2009). Researchers have compared the
              children adopted by heterosexual and
              gay and lesbian couples. The results: The
              children reared by same-sex parents have
              about the same adjustment as children
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