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Diversity in U.S. Families 387
longer my stepmother) is pregnant, and soon we all will have a new brother or sister. Or
will it be a half brother or half sister?
If you can’t figure this out, I don’t blame you. I have trouble myself. It gets very com-
plicated around Christmas. Should we all stay together? Split up and go to several other
homes? Who do we buy gifts for, anyway?
Gay and Lesbian Families
Most gay and lesbian couples lack legal rights to support their relationship. As I write Watch on MySocLab
this, 13 states allow same-sex marriages, 35 states prohibit them, and the laws of two Video: Thinking Like a
states are ambiguous (“U.S. Supreme Court. . .” 2013). A handful of U.S. states Sociologist: Same-Sex
allow people of the same sex to marry, but 41 states have laws that prohibit same-sex Marriage
marriages. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled in 2013 that the federal government cannot
deny benefits to same-sex married couples but did not rule on the constitutionality of
laws that ban same-sex marriage.
What are same-sex relationships like? Researchers have found that the main struggles
of same-sex couples are housework, money, careers, problems with relatives, and sexual
adjustment (Blumstein and Schwartz 1985). If these sound familiar, they should, as they
are the same problems that heterosexual couples face. A major difference is that many
same-sex couples face a stigma, sometimes accompanied by discrimination. As you can
imagine, this complicates a couple’s relationship.
Just as with heterosexual couples, for same-sex couples, marriage is a big step. No
longer is the relationship a casual thing. Instead, it becomes immersed in legal ties
and obligations. Like others, gay and lesbian couples who marry hope that marriage
will make their relationship even more solid. One problem that same-sex couples face
is social acceptance, including acceptance by their families of origin. Researchers have
found that after marriage, most families of origin are more accepting of the couple.
Surprisingly, though, in some instances, the marriage brings less acceptance (Ocobock
2013). Apparently, some disapproving relatives had told themselves that their son,
daughter, nephew, or niece was not in a sexual relationship with “the friend”—even
though the couple had been living together for years. When the couple married, the
relatives could no longer keep up this pretense, and the relationship with the family of
origin fell apart.
As with heterosexual couples, same-sex relationships also sour—and for all the same After years of struggle, including
reasons: disagreements about sex, how to spend money, how to rear children, romantic numerous court cases and lobbying of
legislatures, the U.S. Supreme Court
triangles, and so on. Since about 30 percent of lesbian couples and 17 percent of gay ruled that federal benefits apply
couples are rearing children, breakups equally to gay couples.
bring the usual problems of custody and
visitation (Gartrell et al. 2011).
Except for the sex of the individuals,
same-sex and heterosexual relationships
are quite similar. There is no “exotic dif-
ference” that some people expect to exist.
Major differences center on social accep-
tance and discrimination.
Adoption by Gay and Lesbian Couples.
Adoption by same-sex couples has been a
hot-button issue across the United States.
A fear of heterosexuals is that children
reared by same-sex parents will be pres-
sured into becoming homosexuals (Lewin
2009). Researchers have compared the
children adopted by heterosexual and
gay and lesbian couples. The results: The
children reared by same-sex parents have
about the same adjustment as children