Page 30 - flip book- How To Survive Baby Loss

How To Survive Baby Loss

I cannot take away your pain. It’s not my place to do that.
Your pain is yours. It’s part of the love you feel. What I can
do, however, is letting you know if you look for meaning,
your pain will change, your suffering will end.

Finding meaning and offering meaning is a reason I started
Spark Joy Ministries. There is meaning out of the trenches of
loss. I like David Kessler’s dedication in Finding Meaning, “to
my son in heaven and my son on earth.” This statement is full
of meaning as he honored his child on earth and his child in
heaven.

Perhaps it was for meaning and healing from the loss of their
child that Kathe Wunnenberg wrote, Grieving the Child I Never
Knew, that Kara Mangum founded non-profit, Our Hearts Align,
and that Kerri-Anne Brown started Healing with Wisdom. The
most meaningful gift I ever received from the hospital is the box
from founders Shayla & Arie of Owl Love You Forever, started in
honor of their heavenly twins, Arie and Hadilyn. I have met so
many moms and dads of child loss that my life is more mean-
ingful because of them.

When we despair meaning, our inner dialogue can ask ques-
tions like: What is the meaning of life anyway? What would be my
reason to keep on living? What am I going to do now? What is the
meaning in all of this mess? You may find yourself even bargain-
ing with God.
Child loss feels like the end of our story, but with God, there
is a semicolon rather than a period. Yes, the scars are there, but
we can reach for purpose in the pain if we make our love for
our baby into a verb. Our dialogue can become an outward ex-
pression that can take us from our despair into an action. Your
internal dialogue may be: What can I do to honor my child? I would
like to raise funds for an organization that helps men and women in
their losses. I want to tell my story by blog or writing a book. I want
to comfort someone else so they don’t have to go through this alone.
What about family and friends? They are not understanding
in the way you need. You are trying not to take it out on them,

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