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210 SPIRIT AND THE MIND
After a while, Baba came into the room and lit it up with his excitement. We all filed out behind him on the way to the auditorium. Before I left, one of the teachers at the college asked for my credentials as she was to introduce me. I said that I was simply a devotee, and she smiled.
The auditorium was filled to capacity. What a lovely sight: these disciplined young ladies, sitting straight and tall with faces beaming a great light of love. Within moments it was my turn. I walked to the podium on wobbly legs, opened my mouth—and to my great disappointment, Baba did not talk through it. I was left to my own devices—bobbing and weaving like a drunken sailor on unsteady legs, stranded in the midst of my phobia. Dizzy and dazed, my mind whirling, I said my piece: Baba’s teaching on the four “F’s.” That is, follow the father, face the devil—which in this case was my phobia, a devil that Baba had me face directly and with full force; fight to the end—which I was trying to do on my rubbery legs, all the time calling out for Baba’s help; and finish the game, which I managed to do with a shaky smile on my lips. What a relief.
Then Baba gave his talk. Just to watch him is a great treat, even more so when filled with gratitude at having finished my struggle with moderate success. But to watch this great figure, who is attracting so many great personalities on earth and turning them toward light and service—to watch him deliver, with such poignancy and meaning, the most profound messages of all the scriptures, teaching us with parables and stories and, most of all, his great love and the example of his life—is to be filled with the deepest reverence. His movements, his voice, his gestures, his love, come with such spontaneity, immediacy and innocence. He melts all hearts. You must see this sometime—love literally pouring from his heart. He sang to the girls and his love enveloped us in waves of ecstasy.
He spoke in Telugu. I was sitting next to my brother now and was so happy, having done my part and now being treated to this divine discourse, that I was just beaming. Although I couldn’t understand a word, I was so caught up in Baba’s spontaneous gestures and his delight, that I was filled with love. You could see by the smiles on the faces of the young girls that they were drinking in every word and returning immense devotion. I smiled from ear to ear and with each of his gestures shook my head yes, and nudged my brother with a