Page 52 - How to Write and Publish a Scientific Paper, 8th Edition 8th Edition

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abstracts.

The story goes like this: One night a symphony orchestra was scheduled to play the famous Beethoven's Ninth
Symphony. Before the performance, the bass viol players happened to be chatting among themselves, and one of the
bass players reminded the others that there is a long rest for the bass players toward the conclusion of Beethoven's
Ninth. One bassist said, "Tonight, instead of sitting on the stage looking dumb all that time, why don't we sneak off
the stage, go out the back door, go to the bar across the street, and belt down a few?" They all agreed. That night,
when "rest" time came, they indeed snuck off the stage, went to the bar, and knocked back about four double scotches
each. One bass player said, "Well, it's about time we headed back for the finale." Whereupon another bassist said, "Not
to worry. After we decided to do this, I went up to the conductor's stand and, at the place in the conductor's score
where our rest ends, I tied a bunch of string around his score. It will take him a few minutes to untie those knots. Let's
have another.'' And they did.

At this point, I tell the students, "Now, this story has reached a very dramatic point. If you have put down the
essentials, as you would in a good Abstract, here is what you should have: It's the last of the Ninth, the score is tied,
and the basses are loaded."

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