Page 143 - agnes-grey

‘Really, that is not worth contradicting—I only saw him
there once, I tell you—and how could I know he was com-
ing?’
Irritated as I was at their foolish mirth and vexatious im-
putations, the uneasiness did not continue long: when they
had had their laugh out, they returned again to the captain
and lieutenant; and, while they disputed and commented
upon them, my indignation rapidly cooled; the cause of it
was quickly forgotten, and I turned my thoughts into a pleas-
anter channel. Thus we proceeded up the park, and entered
the hall; and as I ascended the stairs to my own chamber, I
had but one thought within me: my heart was filled to over-
flowing with one single earnest wish. Having entered the
room, and shut the door, I fell upon my knees and offered
up a fervent but not impetuous prayer: ‘Thy will be done,’
I strove to say throughout; but, ‘Father, all things are pos-
sible with Thee, and may it be Thy will,’ was sure to follow.
That wish—that prayer—both men and women would have
scorned me for—‘But, Father, THOU wilt NOT despise!’ I
said, and felt that it was true. It seemed to me that another’s
welfare was at least as ardently implored for as my own; nay,
even THAT was the principal object of my heart’s desire.
I might have been deceiving myself; but that idea gave me
confidence to ask, and power to hope I did not ask in vain.
As for the primroses, I kept two of them in a glass in my
room until they were completely withered, and the house-
maid threw them out; and the petals of the other I pressed
between the leaves of my Bible—I have them still, and mean
to keep them always.

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