Page 427 - lady-chatterlys-lover

Chapter 19

ear Clifford, I am afraid what you foresaw has hap-
Dpened. I am really in love with another man, and do
hope you will divorce me. I am staying at present with
Duncan its his flat. I told you he was at Venice with us. I’m
awfully unhappy for your sake: but do try to take it quietly.
You don’t really need me any more, and I can’t bear to come
back to Wragby. I’m awfully sorry. But do try to forgive me,
and divorce me and find someone better. I’m not really the
right person for you, I am too impatient and selfish, I sup-
pose. But I can’t ever come back to live with you again. And
I feel so frightfully sorry about it all, for your sake. But if
you don’t let yourself get worked up, you’ll see you won’t
mind so frightfully. You didn’t really care about me person-
ally. So do forgive me and get rid of me.
Clifford was not INWARDLY surprised to get this letter.
Inwardly, he had known for a long time she was leaving him.
But he had absolutely refused any outward admission of it.
Therefore, outwardly, it came as the most terrible blow and
shock to him, He had kept the surface of his confidence in
her quite serene.
And that is how we are, By strength of will we cut of four
inner intuitive knowledge from admitted consciousness.
This causes a state of dread, or apprehension, which makes
the blow ten times worse when it does fall.

Lady Chatterly’s Lover