Page 244 - sons-and-lovers

roused him, he sought her.
Then he often avoided her and went with Edgar. Miri-
am and her brother were naturally antagonistic. Edgar was
a rationalist, who was curious, and had a sort of scientific
interest in life. It was a great bitterness to Miriam to see her-
self deserted by Paul for Edgar, who seemed so much lower.
But the youth was very happy with her elder brother. The
two men spent afternoons together on the land or in the loft
doing carpentry, when it rained. And they talked togeth-
er, or Paul taught Edgar the songs he himself had learned
from Annie at the piano. And often all the men, Mr. Leivers
as well, had bitter debates on the nationalizing of the land
and similar problems. Paul had already heard his mother’s
views, and as these were as yet his own, he argued for her.
Miriam attended and took part, but was all the time wait-
ing until it should be over and a personal communication
might begin.
‘After all,’ she said within herself, ‘if the land were na-
tionalized, Edgar and Paul and I would be just the same.’ So
she waited for the youth to come back to her.
He was studying for his painting. He loved to sit at home,
alone with his mother, at night, working and working. She
sewed or read. Then, looking up from his task, he would rest
his eyes for a moment on her face, that was bright with liv-
ing warmth, and he returned gladly to his work.
‘I can do my best things when you sit there in your rock-
ing-chair, mother,’ he said.
‘I’m sure!’ she exclaimed, sniffing with mock scepticism.
But she felt it was so, and her heart quivered with bright-