Page 782 - the-brothers-karamazov

ourable men. She is my light, she is my holy one, and if only
you knew! Did you hear her cry, ‘I’ll go to death with you’?
And what have I, a penniless beggar, done for her? Why
such love for me? How can a clumsy, ugly brute like me,
with my ugly face, deserve such love, that she is ready to go
to exile with me? And how she fell down at your feet for my
sake, just now!... and yet she’s proud and has done nothing!
How can I help adoring her, how can I help crying out and
rushing to her as I did just now? Gentlemen, forgive me! But
now, now I am comforted.’
And he sank back in his chair and, covering his face with
his hands, burst into tears. But they were happy tears. He
recovered himself instantly. The old police captain seemed
much pleased, and the lawyers also. They felt that the ex-
amination was passing into a new phase. When the police
captain went out, Mitya was positively gay.
‘Now, gentlemen, I am at your disposal, entirely at your
disposal. And if it were not for all these trivial details, we
should understand one another in a minute. I’m at those
details again. I’m at your disposal, gentlemen, but I declare
that we must have mutual confidence, you in me and I in
you, or there’ll be no end to it. I speak in your interests. To
business, gentlemen, to business, and don’t rummage in my
soul; don’t tease me with trifles, but only ask me about facts
and what matters, and I will satisfy you at once. And damn
the details!’
So spoke Mitya. The interrogation began again.

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