Page 996 - the-brothers-karamazov
P. 996

Why was it I dreamed of that ‘babe’ at such a moment? ‘Why
       is the babe so poor?’ That was a sign to me at that moment.
       It’s for the babe I’m going. Because we are all responsible for
       all. For all the ‘babes,’ for there are big children as well as
       little children All are ‘babes.’ I go for all, because someone
       must go for all. I didn’t kill father, but I’ve got to go. I ac-
       cept it. It’s all come to me here, here, within these peeling
       walls. There are numbers of them there, hundreds of them
       underground, with hammers in their hands. Oh, yes, we
       shall be in chains and there will be no freedom, but then, in
       our great sorrow, we shall rise again to joy, without which
       man cannot live nor God exist, for God gives joy: it’s His
       privilege — a grand one. Ah, man should be dissolved in
       prayer! What should I be underground there without God?
       Rakitin’s laughing! If they drive God from the earth, we
       shall shelter Him underground. One cannot exist in prison
       without God; it’s even more impossible than out of prison.
       And then we men underground will sing from the bowels of
       the earth a glorious hymn to God, with Whom is joy. Hail
       to God and His joy! I love Him!’
          Mitya was almost gasping for breath as he uttered his
       wild speech. He turned pale, his lips quivered, and tears
       rolled down his cheeks.
         ‘Yes, life is full, there is life even underground,’ he began
       again. ‘You wouldn’t believe, Alexey, how I want to live now,
       what a thirst for existence and consciousness has sprung up
       in  me  within  these  peeling  walls.  Rakitin  doesn’t  under-
       stand that; all he cares about is building a house and letting
       flats. But I’ve been longing for you. And what is suffering? I
   991   992   993   994   995   996   997   998   999   1000   1001