Page 21 - GALIET BENEATH THE ICON: The Lamp Dostoevsky´s Kirillov IV

dwelling in his furious struggle, Kirillov’s last symbolic act becomes a death repertoire suffocated with anguish, frozen with fear and torn with teeth-biting vengeance before he triggers the gun on his pulsing temple. Kirillov remains noble to his ideal to the point of perversion. He wants to be liberated from the fear of death, so that he can be master of his own destiny yet he seems to be thunderstruck by the absurdity of his dilemma and paces erratically, in circle after circle, as if we were reciting Aleksander Pushkin’s poem by heart “strike me dead, but I can’t see the track/I [we’ve] have lost my [our] way, what am I [are we] to do?/A devil seems to be leading me [us] unto the field,/And making me [us] go around in circles.”31
Perhaps Kirillov’s modicum revenge arises out of his hatred for Peter for rushing him to commit suicide outside of his own planned terms denying him of his much-wanted freedom of choice (self-will). If we remember, Kirillov initially refuses to take responsibility for Shatov’s death. He is disgusted by the notion of covering up Peter’s criminal activities including those of his group of five. Kirillov, after being driven to confront his ideology, jumps into a rabid wolfish panic and agrees to sign the note dictated to him out of sheer self-will. Although Kirillov could have easily shot his tormentor to oblivion, murdering another would certainly have violate his character.
31 Dostoevsky, Fyodor. Devils. Trans. Michael Katz. London: Oxford University Press, 1992
• 21 •