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The Red Well-Read Reader
Story 105
Impeached
Joan and Bill walked to the wood’s far reaches, where they climbed some tall
beeches. But when they came down they found in their breeches blood-sucking
leeches! So they ran home making blood-curdling screeches !
Their mother said, “I will not make a speech, nor will I preach. But I hope that
this will teach you each that a promise you do not breach. You promised to pick
only peaches, but instead you climbed those high beeches.
“Now that your promise has been breached, your total character is therefore
impeached.”
Story 106
The Prayerful Swede
The Swede, dressed in his best tweed, mounted his steed and galloped off at
exceedingly fast speed. He was late for church in Runnymede.
In church he said the Apostles’ Creed, promised not to sin by greed, and prayed
for the souls in purgatory to be freed. He prayed to heed God’s word and to do a
daily good deed, especially by helping those in need.
Finally he prayed that his business would succeed and that his hairline wouldn’t
recede.
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