Page 212 - Bridget Jones's Diary - by Helen FIELDING

Monday 4 September

9st, alcohol units 0, cigarettes 27, calories 15, minutes spent having imaginary
conversations with Daniel telling him what I think of him 145 (good, better).

8 a.m. First day at new job. Must begin as mean to go on, with new calm,
authoritative image. And no smoking. Smoking is a sign of weakness and
undermines one's personal authority.

8:30 a.m. Mum just rang, I assumed to wish me luck for the new job.

'Guess what, darling?' she began.

What?'

'Elaine has invited you to their ruby wedding!' she said, pausing breathlessly

and expectantly.

My mind went blank. Elaine? Brian - and - Elaine? Cohn-and-Elaine? Elaine-

named-to-Gordon-who-used-to-be-head-of-Tarmacadamin-Kettering-Elaine?

'She thought it might be nice to have one or two young 'uns there to keep
Mark company.'

Ah. Malcolm and Elaine. Begetters of the overperfect Mark Darcy.

'Apparently he told Elaine he thought you were very attractive.'