Page 347 - Ray Dalio - Principles

Those rules and how you should follow them depend on your
relative believabilities. For example, it would not be effective
for the person who knows less to tell the person who knows

more how something should be done. It’s important to get the
balance between your assertiveness and your open-mindedness
right, based on your relative levels of understanding of the
subject.

Think about whether the person you’re disagreeing with is
more or less believable than you. If you are less believable,
you are more of a student and should be more open-minded,

primarily asking questions in order to understand the logic of
the person who probably knows more. If you’re more
believable, your role is more of a teacher, primarily conveying
your understanding and answering questions. And if you are
approximate peers, you should have a thoughtful exchange as
equals. When there is a disagreement about who is more
believable, be reasonable and work it through. In cases when

you can’t do this alone effectively, seek out the help of an
agreed-upon third party.

In all cases, try to see things through the other person’s eyes
so that you can obtain understanding. All parties should
remember that the purpose of debate is to get at truth, not to
prove that someone is right or wrong, and that each party
should be willing to change their mind based on the logic and

evidence.

a. It’s more important that the student understand the teacher than that the
teacher understand the student, though both are important. I have often
seen less believable people (students) insist that the more
believable people (teachers) understand their thinking and
prove why the teacher is wrong before listening to what the
teacher (the more believable party) has to say. That’s

backward. While untangling the student’s thinking can be
helpful, it is typically difficult and time-consuming and puts
the emphasis on what the student sees instead of on what the
teacher wants to convey. For that reason, our protocol is for
the student to be open-minded first. Once the student has taken

in what the teacher has to offer, both student and teacher will
be better prepared to untangle and explore the student’s