Page 222 - Some Dance to Remember
P. 222

192                                                Jack Fritscher

               they already are by birth—but how they are to stand four-square
               with some dignity against the national religious standard of what
               is sexually “correct.” That is our perversity. We reject the very
               essence so dear to the hearts of the residents of Straight Street who
               require everyone to be like they are. “Like seeks like” is okay for
               them; why is “like seeks like” not okay for us? When we choose to
               reject the way they are, we call their own standards for themselves
               in doubt. We make them think about the way they are. When
               spouses are angry and children are unruly, we are their visions of
               otherness. They envy us for our freedom from their trap. Their
               envy turns to hate. They know nothing about our trap while we
               ironically know everything about theirs.
                   I have chosen to celebrate manhood, not fatherhood, not hus-
               bandry, not anything defined in relation to women and children.
               My vocation is not to the Church. It is not to homosexual politics.
               It is only to the fraternity of men.
                   I suck dick because it smells, tastes, feels, sounds, and looks
               good.
                   I suck dick to scare people.
                   So fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke.

               Ryan had that edge of inborn gay rage to live up to his identity. That
            intensity was his virtue. Against all odds, maybe his vice. Teddy could not
            withstand Ryan’s passion. Kick was reveling in it. That was the difference
            between lover Number One and lover Number Two. Ryan’s fervor lay in
            his pagan nature, rebelling against his Catholicism. Even so, he sought
            Gemini balance. His strict self-discipline, drilled into him by Monsignor
            Linotti at Misericordia, led to the peculiar rarefication of his soul that
            only ordained priests, totally committed to their faith, pagan or not, can
            understand.
               “For some comic relief,” Solly said to January, “why don’t you ask me
            about my Brand-X homosexuality. I’m very content with my boys. Plural.
            Ry wants only one extraordinary bodybuilder god.”
               “What’s so great about your street hustlers,” Ryan said. “Twenty-five
            cents a pound.”
               January sprang to attention. She moved closer to Solly.
               “My boys earn their money because they’re men.” He was determined
            to be grand with January to get even with Ryan shoveling his hip-deep
            bull. “In America, money is the only way of keeping score. My boys are
            hustlers the way everybody is a hustler. They’re entrepreneurs. They’re

                      ©Jack Fritscher, Ph.D., All Rights Reserved
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