Page 280 - Some Dance to Remember

250 Jack Fritscher

Midwest, even through the dying, as they always had in life, homosexual
men were forced to prevaricate their love. Prevarication, not lying exactly,
but not exposing the truth exactly, had for ages been the code and curse
of conduct laid on male lovers from the first of their experimental affairs
to their last parting from the life partner they finally found they had long
and truly loved.
Tony was conscious. He beamed on seeing Ryan. His thin fingers that
had guided Ryan through so many nights of pleasure wrapped weakly
around Ryan’s hand.
“I didn’t know,” Ryan said.
Tony shook his head. It didn’t matter.
“I’m here,” Ryan said. He had to twist himself around. He knew
Tony knew exactly where he was. “Well, so, you certainly have yourself
plugged in.
Tony raised his eyebrows and smiled a yeah-what-can-you-do expres-
sion. Then he pointed to his mouth, shook his head, and pointed to the
tracheotomy.
“I know. You can’t talk. Finally I can get a word in edgewise.”
Tony searched with his fingers for a small pad of paper and a pencil.
He could not locate it an inch away from his grasp. Ryan guided it into
his hand.
“You don’t have to write.” Ryan made one-sided conversation so Tony
could nod yes or no. He knew from so many hours with his father that
those who lay long sick found some strength from outside news. He knew
Tony. He considered discussing the Folsom Street fire. He didn’t want to
upset him, but Tony had lived most of his life on Folsom. He had worked
at one time or another in almost every bar and had played in every bath.
He was a fixture South of Market. He had been a star.
“Have you heard any news from Folsom?” Ryan tested the waters.
Tony shook his head. “The Barracks burned down three nights ago. No
one was hurt. The place was empty. They were remodeling the building.”
He had Tony’s interest; the subject was okay. “The whole place was burned
out. And all the houses around it. Everybody escaped. About a hundred
people have to find new apartments. I guess the arson inspectors found
a lot of chains and fried leather. I always knew the Barracks was so hot,
sometimes when I’d crawl out of there on all fours at sunrise, I’d think this
place has to finally go up in flames. You could see the fire from all over
town. Solly Blue says it was like the burning of Atlanta.”
Tony smiled.
“Actually, with the way downtown is growing, I suspect they’ll build

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