Page 839 - Total War on PTSD

and I'd be underneath the counters, on the floor. My PTSD gives me a lot of anxiety. I get really anxious. The other day after I had my surgery and got back home, Meika wouldn't leave me. When I was in bed she would lay on top of my feet. Both dogs are the same way...they wouldn't leave me alone. If it wasn't for the psych. meds. that I need to take I probably wouldn't go there anymore. Their service is just that bad. For Psych. Meds. the doctor does a really good job. I am in the MEICAM Program because I tried to commit suicide last year. The program is intensive case management...so I visit with a guy twice a week...and see the meds. doctor whenever I need to. I just call her and we have a meeting. And that's cool because it used to take two to three weeks to see the med. doctor. And then if the med. change didn't work then you had to wait two to three more weeks before it would be changed again. This way I'd see the doctor right away and it would get changed right away. Any time I have problems I call and talk to them. They're great. It's almost like having a counselor right there and ready for you.
When we went to Desert Storm we were training in the winter time in Fort Riley when it was snowing...and we were doing desert training. So that was kind of interesting. It did snow in the gulf...in Saudi Arabia...at night...it did get cold enough to snow. My first experience there...I was terrified...I thought we were going right into combat.
My next memories were the first time I saw somebody die. They were in a truck. There were six of them in the front of a semi-truck...three on the tail of the semi-truck...because it was a bobtail...there was no trailer on it. They had a head-on collision. We went up the road right after they cleared it...and there were bodies everywhere. They did not clear them out. Not for quite a long while. We had just eaten lunch with them not 45 minutes before. It was really kinda
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