Page 21 - Devlin Funeral Home

with it are the customs around death and burial. It is romantic to set the ashes out to sea or scatter them at the top of the mountain or in the garden. It is important that the place that the ashes have been scattered becomes the sanctuary for the deceased and is marked, if only in memory, for family and friends to visit this place and remember their roots. To tell the story to their children and their children’s children. To remember that their loved one was set adrift at Mission Point or Garden Bay. We may not have traditions that maintain a cemetery for generations to come or a “home where our people are buried” however, it is important to establish a place that others can go and reflect on the loved one and talk about for generations to come.
The Value of Symbols and Ceremony
Holding a Celebration of Life/Memorial Service is an essential part of the process towards living your life in a new way without your loved one. A service provides those who are grieving with a supportive environment in which they can process their loss, gather with community, tell stories, share memories and say goodbye.
Gathering with friends and family gives everyone the opportunity to connect, offer words of sympathy and create a lasting network of comfort and support as you, your family and the community start the journey toward healing and peace with the reality that your loved one is gone. No matter the setting, style or direction you choose, our staff are available to assist you in creating a service that reflects your loved one’s unique life journey. We offer services in locations other than on site and have a list of appropriate venues, samples of brochures and an outline of things to include when designing the ceremony. We also have an on staff Certified Celebrant who is happy to meet with your family to design a personal and memorable celebration.
The Value of Symbols and Ceremony
There is value in the family viewing their loved one after death. Thankfully in our community we have the opportunity to do so when our loved one dies at home, in a local facility or in the hospital. Families find great meaning and peace in this experience.
If a loved one dies tragically or unexpectedly the value of viewing the body, touching the body and experiencing the reality of death is unquestionable. Until we are in this situation and experience the understanding it is difficult to explain how the effect helps the grieving process. In most circumstances we encourage family members to view their loved one prior to cremation or burial especially if they were not at the bedside of the deceased or if they were witness to a tragic situation during the death. In all instances the family members are grateful for this advice as the viewing helps confirm the reality that the mind is trying to deny. As difficult as it may be one cannot regret viewing as they could regret not viewing.
The Value of Significance
When good things happen to us we want to share their significance. The same holds true when bad or sad things happen. They have a significant role in our lives and it is healthy to share this. Once we are able to establish significance we are able to move on.
Friends and family are not always comfortable with people talking about their pain. They are not always comfortable talking about the person who has died. The desire to move on and talk about something more pleasant is a common response. The opposite of significance is trivialization. Trivialization creates anger in the person who is grieving.
Devlin Funeral Home - Page 21