Page 47 - Vision Manual

uncomfortable in newly-forming relationships. Disclosing personal information can also make you vulnerable to others. When starting a relationship it is best to keep things light and learn about the other person in positive ways that promote interest and understanding.
Questions: Think about the relationships that you have with people you are close to. How did they start? What keeps them close? How do you maintain them?
Strategies for building closer relationships
Getting closer to people, including developing friendships and intimate relationships, is an important goal to many people. The most rewarding close relationships are ones in which every person cares about the other person’s perspective and well-being. In order to be close to others, it is important to be able to share more personal things about yourself and to be open to them sharing more personal things about themselves to you. It is also important to be willing to do things to help the other person. There are a number of different things that you can do to work to build a relationship once it’s started. A few strategies are listed below:
 Attend to the Relationship
Relationships require some time and energy put into them. Generally speaking, the newer the relationship, the more attention that it needs. You can attend to a relationship by calling, texting or communicating with someone over facebook or other social media (remember, though that talking on the phone or over the internet can be more complicated than talking face to face). You can also attend to relationships by scheduling regular times to meet with a person for lunch, coffee, a walk through the park, or spending time hanging out. Some relationships take more energy than others, and so make sure that you are aware of how much time and effort you are putting into a relationship.
 Practice Gradual Disclosure
As we get to know people we may want to share more about ourselves. This might be information about our past, things we’ve experienced, troubles that we have had or are having, our mental health diagnoses, and even past traumas. It’s important to recognize that this is information that can be serious, emotional and important to us. If you tell new people about the deeper things in your life too quickly, or all at once, it might be overwhelming. That’s why it’s important to practice gradual disclosure. The idea of gradual disclosure is that when we tell people about ourselves we start slowly and share things that are the least emotionally provocative, serious, or vulnerable. There’s no rule of thumb as to how fast or slow you
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