Page 73 - EAP Manual

Emotion Regulation
WHAT DO I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT FEELINGS?
Feelings are NOT positive or negative...good or bad...right or wrong...
 Judging feelings can be invalidating, & it sends a message that some are not “ok”
 Feeling uncomfortable feelings does not means that there is something wrong with me
 *Try thinking about feelings as comfortable or uncomfortable...enjoyable or difficult
I am NOT my feeling.
 Feelings are only a part of me
 Just because I have a feeling does not mean that I am that feeling
 *Try noticing a feeling without clinging to it
I CANNOT get rid of feelings.
 Feelings are a normal part of life
 Sometimes people try to stuff & ignore uncomfortable feelings; however, they do not
go away, they just get bigger & last longer
 *Try accepting uncomfortable feelings
Feelings DO NOT last forever.
 It may feel like they will never end, but they do come & go
 Sometimes people keep feelings around by thinking about them or doing things that
keep them around
 *Try using Distress Tolerance skills to cope
Feelings are NOT facts.
 Intense feelings can feel like the “truth” because our thoughts and actions copy that feeling
 *Try using a Nonjudgmental Stance to stick to the facts and avoid labels
I CAN have a feeling, and NOT act on it.
 It’s normal for my body to be pulled into doing something based on my feelings
 I have a choice to act or not act
 *Try using Urge Surf or another Distress Tolerance skill
My feelings ARE unique to me.
 I can experience a feeling in different parts of my body than my friend does with the same feeling
 I can also feel something different than my friend who is also in the same situation as me
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