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It is said that laughter is the best medicine, so when it comes
to keeping you healthy, laughter is up there with a nutritious diet and exercise.
The ARMY -- Then and Now Airborne! Tankers
Then- A drill instructor at Airborne school Our son is in the Army, stationed
was lecturing a group of new troops in Kentucky. He invited my
Rifles were made of wood and on making a proper jump. He told husband and I for a visit.
steel, shot a 7.62 caliber bullet them: "When I yell Stand Up, you
that killed the enemy. Stand Up. When I yell hook up, you After driving endlessly through
Now- hook up. When you go out the door, unfamiliar streets in search of an
entrance to Fort Knox, my
yell 'Geronimo!' and wait for your
Rifles are made of plastic and chute to open. Got It? Good, get in husband suddenly said, "We're
aluminum, shoot a .223 caliber the plane." getting closer."
bullet that wounds the enemy. "How do you know?" I asked.
After a short flight he yelled "Stand
Then- UP! Hook UP!" and began shoving He pointed to a sign that read:
the troops out the door. Just after
If you smoked, you had an ashtray the last trooper exited, the sergeant 'Sonny's Bar-B-Q...Tank Parking
on your desk. shut the door. Suddenly, he heard Available'
Now- someone knocking on the door. He The ARMY -- Then and Now
opened it to see a private flapping continued
If you smoke, you are sent outside his arms trying to imitate a seagull.
and are treated like a leper. The private looked him in the eye Then-
and asked What did you say that
Then- Indian's name was? You slept in a barracks... like a
soldier.
If you said "damn," people knew
you were annoyed and avoided Soldiers in Heaven Now- You sleep in a dormitory...
you. like a college kid.
Little Willie asked his mother:
Now- "Mamma, don't soldiers ever go to Then-
RAFINO Board
If you say "damn" you better be heaven?" If you wanted to beer and a
talking about a hydroelectric plant. "Of course they do!" protested his conversation you could go to the
mother. "What makes you ask?" NCO or Officers Club.
Then-
"There are so many soldiers with Now-
NCO's had a typewriter on their beards but I never saw any pictures
desks for doing daily reports. The beer will cost you $3.00, it’s a
of angels with beards."
Now- Community Club, and someone is
"Oh, that's because most men who watching how much you drink.
Everyone has an Internet go to Heaven get there by a close Then-
computer, and they wonder why shave."
no work is getting done. The Post Exchange had bargains
for GI's who didn't make much
Then- He is not balding...
money.
We painted pictures of pretty girls Civilian: He is in Follicle Regression. Now-
on airplanes to remind us of
home. Soldier: He has a REALLY squared You can get better merchandise
away high and tight.
cheaper at Wal-Mart.
Now-
Then-
We put the real thing in the
cockpit. All you could think of was getting
Q: What's the difference between a out and becoming a civilian again.
“There is nothing more satisfying Private E-2 and a Second
that having someone take a shot Lieutenant? Now-
at you, and miss.”
A: The Private E-2 has been All you can think of is getting out
A Murphy's Military Law promoted. and becoming a civilian again.
