Page 97 - Christians are not Human_ (1)_Neat

Uncle Hubbard’s Skin Diving Suit

When I was about fourteen years old I went to stay with my

Uncle Hubbard and Aunt Magee just for a few days so I could

go deer hunting. My uncle was a scavenger; he was always

finding things. Some people were moving and they left some

things behind, you know out by the street. My Uncle found

himself a black rubber skin diving suit and he brought it home

with him the day I came to visit.

He was in the living room fooling around with the suit and my

aunt confronted him about it. It was his plan to wear that suit

under his clothes while he was deer hunting. He had come to the

conclusion that it would keep him warm. My Aunt Magee, my

little cousin Cindy, and I settled down to watch a little

television. While we were occupied my uncle was in the

background fiddling around with his suit. Somewhere in the

middle of our program our attention was redirected toward some

kind of noise coming from behind us.

It's really hard to explain what it sounded like, but if you can

imagine what an elephant might sound like being smothered

under a giant pillow, it was something like that. The sound

startled us and we turned amazed to see Uncle Hubert with the
top of the skin diving suit pulled over his head with both arms

trapped in the sleeves unable to come through the sleeve

openings and the head opening sealed up tight like it was glued

together. Unable to use his hands he was stuck. He reminded me