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What Is The Christmas Story? 11
What is the Christmas
story? The history behind
our festive traditions and
Santa Claus
Continued from Page 9
The tree
So who DID suggest cutting down a huge piece
of shrubbery, dragging it into the house,
covering it with lights, then sticking a model
fairy on top? Then leaving it there until it drops
needles all over the floor.
Blame a German. The Romans had hung
up the odd bit of green branch, but it was
evangelist Martin Luther from Saxony who first The top 30 Christmas not.
decorated a whole fir tree.
That was in 1510. The idea finally cracker jokes of 2016 15. Why can’t the England football team play
spread to Britain during Queen Victoria's reign revealed - and they're Yahtzee this Christmas? Because they got rid of
when her German-born husband Prince Albert Allardyce.
had one sent over to remind him of his own actually funny
childhood Christmases. 16. I can’t get to the chocolates in my advent
calendar. Foiled again.
A drawing of the Royals and their
1. How will Christmas dinner be different after
children standing around their perfect tree
Brexit? No Brussels.
appeared in the Illustrated London News in 17. Why is Bob Dylan’s sleigh so quiet?
1846 - and next year there was a rush to copy Because it has Nobel.
2. What do workers at Sports Direct get for
them.
Christmas dinner? About five minutes.
Artificial trees were invented in the 18. Why is everyone filing for divorce and
custody of the kids this Christmas? Tis the
1930s, by the Addis Company, who turned them
3. How do you recognise a Christmas tree from season to be Jolie.
out using spare machines in their, er, toilet-
BHS? All the branches have gone.
brush factory.
19. Who might be cooking Christmas dinner at
4. I bought my mum Mary Berry’s cookbook for
Cards Number 10 this year? Theresa May.
Christmas, I tried to get Paul Hollywood’s but
he’d sold out. 20. Why can’t Mary Berry eat turkey
Not surprisingly, the custom of sending
sandwiches? Paul Hollywood took all the bread.
Christmas cards didn't start until there was a 5. What’s David Cameron’s favourite Christmas
postal service to deliver them. song? All I Want For Christmas is EU. 21. Why doesn’t Sam Allardyce help load
The first were sent in 1843 by Sir Henry
Santa’s sleigh? Because it takes him 67 days to
Cole, boss of the Victoria and Albert Museum. 6. Why has Hillary Clinton asked Santa for a get the sack.
He was far too busy to write letters so had an 23-letter alphabet? Because she is sick of F-B-I
artist design 1,000 cards, illustrated with a
22. Why did the snowman pull out of Strictly?
festive family scene on the front and printed 7. Why didn’t Roy Hodgson go to visit Santa at
with the greeting, "A Merry Christmas and a the North Pole? He couldn’t get past Iceland . Because he got cold feet.
Happy New Year to You".
23. How do you pay respect to David Bowie this
Horrified at being caught out, all his 8. Why are Jeremy Corbyn ’s Christmas cards
friends sent him one back the next year. on the floor? His cabinet collapsed . Xmas? By serving some Ziggy pudding.
In 1880 cards had become so popular
24. What’s Tom Hiddleston starring in over
that the public were warned for the first time to 9. Prince Philip looks out of the window on Christmas? The Night Manger
post early for Christmas. A few of them might Christmas Eve. “That’s some reindeer,” he says.
still be at the bottom of a mailsack somewhere... The Queen replies: “63 years. Yes, that is a lot.” 25. What does Nigel Farage do to the hall with
boughs of holly? He Dexit.
Tinsel 10. What’s the difference between the
clementine in your Christmas stocking and 26. What did Tim Peake get in his stocking this
The first mass-produced Christmas decoration, Donald Trump? Nothing, they’re both a little year? Galaxy and Milky Way.
it was made in Europe in the 1600s from sheets orange .
of silver alloy hammered until they were paper-
27. Why did Ed Balls fail an audition to play one
thin and cut into strips. 11. What do you get if you cross Donald Trump of Santa’s reindeer in a Christmas pantomime?
The idea was to reflect the light from with a Christmas Carol? O Comb Over Ye Because he’s no Dancer.
candles and fireplaces. Problem - after a few Faithful.
Christmases, the silver turned black. A cheaper,
28. What’s Donald Trump’s favourite type of ice
throwaway tinsel made from aluminium-based 12. What’s the best advice you can give at the cream? Wall’s.
paper swept the festive market in the 1950s. UKIP Christmas party? Avoid the punch .
Problem - it went up like a flash when it caught
29. Why’s Santa going round the world this
fire. 13. Why did the three wise men only have Christmas Eve? He’s playing Pokemon Ho Ho
Now we have a modern tinsel made frankincense and myrrh? Because Team GB Ho.
from PVC that won't discolour and won't burn. took all the gold .
Problem - it's toxic and can't be recycled. Over
30. How do snowmen leave the EU? They
to you, Greenpeace... [] 14. Which parent is likely to do the Christmas trigger Icicle 50. []
shop at Tesco this year? Dad might, Marmite