Page 16 - Provoke Mag Vol6

The “FinnaDo” Infestation!!!
-Kenneth Marshall
My homeboys and I were discussing this epidemic at the barbershop. We were trying to figure out how and why men that have nothing and don’t show any ambi- tion to get up and get out to get something, get women. These so called “FinnaDo Men” talk a great game of what they are “Finna” do like, “Finna start their own business”, “finna get a job”, or “their CD Finna drop!” Most popular, “I’m Finna get a divorce so we can be together.” Let me begin by defining this man for you.
Fin-na -dō noun
1. a male who tricks or deceives women especially to have them take care of him.
2. a male that’s really not interested in working but who tells a female enabler about many projects and goals that he ei- ther has in works and that he’s going to start or complete and never does in hopes of her seeing potential in him and acquir- ing him as a pet project to assist in making his dreams come true or to develop him into the man she wants.
3. to control or play upon a female enabler’s need for intimate companionship, drama within a relationship, and her fears of being alone by artful, unfair, or insidious means especially to his own advantage and to serve his purpose... (A place to stay, her car to drive, and for both SEX)
Synonyms for the “Finnado” include but are not limited to: Couch Potato, Deadbeat, Do-nothing, Idler, Layabout, Lazybones, Sluggard, Dreamer, Swindler, Trickster, Scam- mer.
Characteristics of the Finnado are a smooth, slick and sweet-talker. He is usually above average in looks, he has better than average bedroom skills, and a great sense of humor. Other FinnaDo indicators include:
1) The guy with the nice car and he can’t keep it filled with gas.
2) He lives with five roommates in a one bedroom apart- ment and claims that he will soon have his own place.
3) He’s sleeping on an inflatable bed with no dishes in his apartment.
Even though he claims to have his own place, he always wants to come over to the woman’s place of residence. His most common excuses include:
1) His girl put him out
2) He is moving next month
3) He had to help my friend out
16 Provokeusmag.com
So how do the FinnaDo men get their foot into the door? Where do they find these women? What are they saying to these willing enablers of worthless men? These types of guys not only exist, but they are thriv- ing out of control. They have become an infestation in the United States. One thing is for certain ladies, a parasite cannot exist without a host to feed on and a FinnaDo cannot thrive unless he has an enabler. Women have created the perfect environment for the FinnaDo to takeover! Through interviews and casu- al conversation, I’ve found that some women feel that between The FinnaDo Guy and The GetitDone Man, no matter whom she ends up with, she feels she will have to do some level of settling for and doing without. Women have told me, if a guy has a good job and has his finances in order, he usually doesn’t have the time to nurture the relationship. Due to him sustaining his finances, he’s sometimes unable to be there for quality time and doesn’t show the softer, more romantic side. The guy that has nothing really going for himself, the “finnado” gives her all the time she wants, holds her, and does all the little things that she begged the guy that has his life together to do for her.
Let’s dig deeper into this epidemic and try to tap into the psyche of these women. Let’s try to find the root cause for why seemingly intelligent women continue to make the same bad investment and are so willing to play the role of the enabler.