Page 253 - It Ends with Us

“Yes . I kep t the magnet Atlas gave me when we were kids. Yes . I

kep t the journa ls. No, I didn’t tel l you about my tattoo. Yes , I probably
sho uld ha ve. And yes , I still love hi m. And I’ll love hi m unt il I die,
bec ause he was a hu ge part of my life. And yes , I’m sure tha t hu rts
you. But no ne of tha t gave you the right to do wha t you did to me.
Even if you would ha ve walked int o my bed room and caught us in bed
toget her, you still would no t ha ve the right to lay a ha nd on me, you

goddamn son of a bitch! ”
I push off hi s knees and stand up again. “No w it’s your turn! ” I yel l.
I cont inu e pacing the room. My hea rt is pound ing like it want s out.
I wish I could give it a way out. I’d set the mother -fucker free right
no w if I could.
Sev era l minu tes pass as I continu e to pace. R yle’s silenc e and my
ang er ev ent ually just fold toget her int o pain.

My tea rs ha ve ex ha usted me. I am so tired of feel ing . I fall
des pera tel y ont o my bed and cry int o my pillow. I pres s my face so
ha rd agains t my pillow, I can barel y brea the.
I feel R yle lie down nex t to me. He places a gent le ha nd on the
back of my hea d, attem pting to sooth away the pain he’s causing me.
My ey es are closed , still pres sed int o the pillow, but I feel hi m gent ly

res t hi s hea d agains t mine.
“My truth is tha t I ha ve absolutel y no thi ng to say,” he says quiet ly.
“I’ll nev er be able to take back wha t I did to you. And you’ll nev er
bel iev e me if I promise it won’t ha ppen again. ” He pres ses a kiss
agains t my hea d. “You are my world, Lily. My world. When I woke up
on thi s bed tha t ni ght and you were gone, I knew I would nev er get
you back. I came here to tel l you ho w inc red ibly sorr y I am. I came to

tel l you I was taking tha t job offer in Minnes ota. I came to tel l you
goodbye. But Lily . . .” His lips pres s agains t my hea d again and he
ex ha les sha rply. “Lily, I can’t do tha t no w. You ha ve a part of me ins ide
of you. And I alrea dy love thi s baby more tha n I’ve ev er loved
any thi ng in my who le life. ” His voice cracks and he grips me ev en
ha rder. “Plea se don’t take thi s away from me, Lily. Pleas e.”

The pain in hi s voice ripples thro ugh me, and when I lift my tea r-
soaked face to look at hi m, he pres ses hi s lips des pera tel y to mine and
then pulls back. “Plea se, Lily. I love you. Help me. ”