Page 194 - A Woman Is No Man

Deya

Winter 2008

By Sunday, Fareeda had arranged another meeting with Nasser. It was a

cold winter day, and Deya circled the sala with a serving tray. She served
Nasser’s mother Turkish coffee and roasted watermelon seeds, while
Fareeda chatted on, her gold tooth flashing between her lips. Deya wanted
to fling the serving tray across the room. How could she trust her
grandmother, after all she had learned from Sarah? How could she pretend
nothing was wrong? She couldn’t. She needed to stop stalling, needed to
speak up for herself before it was too late.

“My grandmother thinks I should marry you,” she said as she settled
across from Nasser at the kitchen table. “She says I’d be a fool to turn down
your proposal. But I can’t marry you. I’m sorry.”
Nasser straightened. “Why not?”
She had the sudden urge to take her words back, but she made herself
go on. She could her Sarah’s voice in her ear: Be brave. Speak up for what

you want. She turned to meet Nasser’s eyes. “What I mean is, I’m not ready
to get married. I want to go to college first.”
“Oh,” Nasser said. “Well, you can do both. Many girls go to college
after marriage.”
“Are you saying you would let me go to college?”
“I don’t see why not.”
She blinked at him. “What about after college? Would you let me

work?”
Nasser stared at her. “Why would you need to work? You’ll be well
provided for.”
“But what if I want to work with my degree?”
“If both of us were working, then who would raise the children?”

“See? That’s my point.”
“What point?”