Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #523

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A pregnant lady went to an astrologer.
Astrologer: When you deliver a baby, the baby's father will die.
Lady: Thank god! My husband is safe!
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry andalotofmen will be sad that day."
Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"
Vincent Van Gogh had a really large family. Here's a listing of some of the lesser known relatives:
The really obnox- ious brother - Please Gogh
The brother who ate prunes - Gotta Gogh
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking - Wayto Gogh
And his magician uncle - Wherediddy Gogh
A lawyer and an engineer were
fishing in the sunny Caribbean. They were dis- cussing their great vacations when the lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and every- thing I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insur- ance company paid for every- thing."
That is quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance compa- ny also paid for everything."
The lawyer, quite puzzled, asked, "How do YOU start a flood?"
While my third- grade class was completing a writ- ing exercise, one of the students asked me how to spell "piranha."
ItoldhimIwas unsure. To my delight, he went to the dictionary to solve his prob- lem.
That's when I overheard anoth- er pupil say to him, "Why bother
to look it up? She doesn't know how to spell it any- way."
My boss always laughed at my jokes at work, but since the pan- demic she never laughs at them in Zoom chats. I asked her why doesn't she laugh at them anymore.
She replied, "Because your jokes aren't remotely funny."
A lady dropped her handbag in the bustle of holi- day shopping. An honest, little boy noticed her drop the handbag, so he picked it up and returned it to her. The lady looked into her handbag and commented, "Hmm... That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills."
The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a purse, the owner didn't have any change for a reward."
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Houston's 'Darth Vader House' Listed For $4.3 million
Click Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlYAIgmQ_fc
By Ben Hooper
May 27 (UPI) -
- A Houston house for sale is drawing attention online for its resemblance
to Star Wars vil- lain Darth Vader.
The 7,000- square-foot home in the University Place
neighborhood is nicknamed
the "Darth Vader house" due to the exterior's resemblance to the Dark Lord of the Sith's helmet in the science fic- tion franchise.
The house, which was built in 1992, is cur- rently listed
for $4.3 million by Wade Knight with Martha Turner Sotheby's International Realty.
The house fea- tures four bed- rooms, four and a half bathrooms and a four-car attached garage.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine