Page 35 - Tree of Happiness
P. 35

Worksheet
Not everyone has our best interest at heart. It is a sad realization that others have “agendas” and that we must be strong to do what we know is right. The Advisors did not want the Queen to build the Road. But she told herself something and she was able to resist them. It is important that we develop good “coping self- messages” that help us resist the Stinky Thinking of others.
Knowing what we should do and then doing it, even without the support of others is very difficult and frequently scary. We do not typically have this type of self- message and it must be developed. This is an opportunity for children to illustrate that they have or can have a repertory of good coping self-messages, “She told herself that this was something she had to do even if others did not want her to do it.” Going against the wishes of peers (Advisors) is very difficult. But it is important to understand that this is an example of Good Thinking.
The Queen was able to stick with her decision because she was able to focus on a future and a somewhat nebulous goal, The Tree of Happiness. But isn’t that what all successful people do in real life. They do not focus on the dilemmas of the immediate but the promise of the future. Without this skill of staying focused on a goal and enduring the current difficulties, you will never be able to be successful or happy.
Finally, we ask the most important question in the lives of many children, “When others give you advice, is it always good advice?” It is frequently difficult for children to accept that advice, which is well intentioned, is sometimes wrong. Also, that advice can sometimes be calculating and deceitful. Ultimately, you must make your own decisions and accept the consequences of your decisions.
1. The advisors told the Queen that building the road was a bad idea. If she had allowed herself to think they were correct, how would she have felt?
Sad and disappointed.
2. What would she have done about building the road? Nothing.
3. The Queen did not listen to the advisors because of her self-messages. What was she thinking?
There is no reason not to try and build a road. If I don’t try, I will never get into the Tree of Happiness.
4. How was she feeling because of her “Good Thinking?” Confident and strong.
5. How did she act?
She told them that she was going to build the road and if any of them wanted to leave, they could.
6. When others give you advice, is it always good advice? No, because sometimes they have Stinky Thinking.
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